One of your friends wants to apply for a job at a summer school camp as a sports trainer. Write a letter to the camp manager to recommend your friends. In your letter: say how well you know your friend describe the qualifications and experience that your friend has explain why your friend would be suitable for this job

#friends #job #summer #school #camp #sports #trainer #manager #friend #qualifications

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to recommend my friend, John, for the position of

sports

trainer at your summer school camp. Let me tell you more about him.

Firstly

, I have known John for nine years and he has a passion for teaching

sports

skills to children. He can freely communicate with children. John has previous experience working as a

sports

trainer for a city

center

Change the spelling

centre

show examples

school where he demonstrated his skills and experience. His proficiency in volleyball and handball is remarkable. I personally participated in training with him and he

is ability

Wrong verb form

has been able

show examples

to dominate and motivate others. I am sure that Brown's great experience, skill, diligence, responsibility,

ability

Correct word choice

and ability

show examples

to get along well with others make him exceptionally well-suited for the role of

sports

trainer at your camp. I hope you will consider my suggestion and offer him

this

opportunity. Thank you for your attention to

this

matter. Yours faithfully, Samandar

Submitted by omondavlat91 on Tue Mar 05 2024

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Task Achievement

In the first paragraph, it's beneficial to directly mention the position and the purpose of the letter, which you have done well. However, you could enhance the introduction by briefly summarizing why John is suitable for the position, for a more impactful beginning.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your paragraphs are well-structured, each focusing on a unique aspect of John's qualifications and suitability for the job. To further improve clarity, consider using transitional phrases or sentences at the beginning or end of each paragraph to better link them together.

General

Make sure to proofread your letter to correct minor mistakes, such as 'he is ability' which should be 'his ability'. Attention to such details will ensure your letter is perceived as professional and polished.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

153 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

ardent enthusiast
physical education
sportsmanship
pragmatic approach
diligence
team spirit
engaging personality
mentorship
leadership qualities
communication skills
first-aid certified
discipline
adaptability
youth mentor
enthusiastic
influential coach
role model
positive reinforcement
camaraderie
empathy

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In many cities the population is increasing. Some say that the urbanization process denies us knowing our neighbors, and this causes a loss of community sense. What is the main problem with this? What measures can be taken to overcome it?

Some people think that robots are very important to human's future development, while others think that they are dangerous and have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries, people are now living longer than before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for government. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extend do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+