Nowadays, more people move away from their families and friends for work. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?
In the era of
globalization
many people choose to pursue their career in another country far away from their friends and families. Add a comma
globalization,
Although
this
trend has many drawbacks, I firmly believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
To begin
with, if an employee has the opportunity to work abroad, it can be a great chance to immerse in a completely new culture,
and utilize his or her language knowledge. Remove the comma
apply
Besides
this
, if the job destination is **non-English** speaking country, but the firm is worldwide, the individual can **begin learning** a new language, expanding one’s knowledge. Additionally
, this
can be beneficial for the company too, because it facilitates the cultural diversity inside the firm, and also
a foreign employee can bring new ideas and innovations outside the borders.
However
, the fact that the employee is from abroad, can arise
several issues for both the worker and the employer too. Correct your spelling
raise
For example
, the foreigner can have the feeling of being constantly an outsider in the eyes of the local residents and employers. Nonetheless
, it can be extremely hard to fit in
an utterly new and different environment, Change preposition
into
understand
its cultural rules, Correct word choice
and understand
not to mention
being far away from friends and families, that
can result in the feeling of homesickness. In terms of the employer, it can be much harder to train a foreigner than a local applier, and for some **companies, it might** **be Correct pronoun usage
which
an
important to employ only Change the article
apply
domestic
workforce.**
Correct article usage
a domestic
To conclude
, working in another nation is becoming more and more popular for some individual
, but Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
the
one has to be aware Correct article usage
apply
its
drawbacks and challenges. Change preposition
of its
However
, I still believe that this
opportunity brings more benefits than damages.Submitted by rkerkovits on
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Task Achievement
Ensure the introduction clearly presents the topic and your stance on the issue, which you have done effectively. In the conclusion, succinctly summarize your argument, reinforcing your initial stance.
Task Achievement
In the body paragraphs, introduce each main point with a clear topic sentence. Develop each point with specific examples, ensuring relevance to the question prompt.
Coherence & Cohesion
Organize your essay in a logical manner, starting with an introduction, followed by body paragraphs that explore both advantages and disadvantages, and ending with a conclusion. This structure is present and appropriately applied in your essay.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to connect ideas within and across paragraphs, enhancing the flow of your essay. Consider varying these connectors to avoid repetition.
Task Achievement
To further improve, consider expanding on your examples with more detailed explanations or personal experiences. This can enhance the relatability and depth of your arguments.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.