In many developing countries, there is an increasing movement of workers from rural areas into cities. Why do you think this happen? What problems can this cause.

#countries #movement #workers #areas #cities #happen

In most of the underdeveloped nations. We see an increasing trend of

labor

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labour

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from the countryside to the urban

centers

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centres

show examples

. In my view, there are two main causes of it. One of the primary causes is industrial development in main urban

centers

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centres

show examples

generating employment opportunities. The other cause is

cities

have better educational institutes and health care

centers

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centres

show examples

. Industries in developing countries are mainly found in major

cities

Due to

fact

Correct article usage

the fact

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the rural areas are not

much

Rephrase

very

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developed,

subsequently

, having

lesser

Correct word choice

fewer

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employment opportunities.

Furthermore

, per capita income in

cities

is way higher than

their

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in their

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rural counterparts.

This

unequal distribution attracts people

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from

show examples

the countryside to move towards the major

cities

of the country.

Moreover

infrastructure

Add an article

the infrastructure

show examples

cities

including transportation

also

got upgraded near the industries to facilitate the workers. One of the other reasons is that the

cities

have good quality

Change preposition

apply

show examples

educational facilities. The universities located in urban

centers

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centres

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are equipped with better infrastructure, teachers and supporting facilities.

Therefore

, every person

desire

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desires

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that his/her child will get

education

Correct article usage

an education

show examples

from the top institutes of the country.

On the other hand

Cities

have the best hospitals

Change preposition

show examples

the country. Which

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

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citizens feel more secure to live in urban areas.

Furthermore

, rural

area

Fix the agreement mistake

areas

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do not have the

facility

Fix the agreement mistake

facilities

show examples

and equipment to treat some fatal diseases so they transfer their patients towards the big hospitals located in main urban

centers

To conclude

, Countryside people in less developed nations migrate to main

cities

to have access to employment opportunities and can provide their children with better educational and

health care

Correct your spelling

healthcare

show examples

facilities.

Submitted by SyedSaad776 on Thu Mar 07 2024

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coherence cohesion

Provide a variety of complex sentence structures and aim for consistency in verb tense usage to improve clarity.

task achievement

It's beneficial to include specific examples or data to support your main points; this adds depth and credibility to your essay.

coherence cohesion

While your introduction and conclusion are present, strive for stronger opening sentences and more dynamic concluding remarks to make your essay stand out.

task achievement

Carefully proofread your essay to avoid grammatical errors and ensure that each paragraph develops a single idea fully.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In many developing countries, there is an increasing movement of workers from rural areas into cities. Why do you think this happen? What problems can this cause.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about his problem?

Today, most people are suffering from stress. What are the causes? What solutions can be offer?

Some believe that in the next 100 years most people will have a better life, while others disagree. What is your opinion?

Nowadays, many people choose to be self-employed rather than to work for a company or organizations. Why might this be the case ? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed ?

Some people feel that manufactures and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of foods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.