IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

A restaurant has placed an advertisement for waiters and waitresses in your local newspaper. Write a letter to the restaurant, applying for the job. In your letter: -Explain what you are currently doing -Describe your suitability for this area of work -Say when you can attend an interview

#restaurant #advertisement #waiters #waitresses #newspaper #job #-explain #-describe #suitability #area #work #-say #interview
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Dear Sir or Madam I am writing to apply for
waiter
Correct article usage
the waiter
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 position in your restaurant "Bon" that you have advertised in your local newspaper. Let me explain what
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 am currently doing. At present,
i
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I
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 am studying at Bukhara State University. So,
i
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I
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 am
student
Add an article
a student
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 and
i
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I
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 would like to cover my costs and pay
debts
Correct pronoun usage
my debts
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. I feel that
i
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I
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 am the most suitable candidate for
this
 job because of my ambition and drive to make a
changeand
Correct your spelling
change
, and I can
also
 communicate in four languages. I study every day except
sunday
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Sunday
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 so,
i
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I
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 want to attend an interview
in
Change preposition
on
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this
 day. I appreciate
you
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your
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 consideration
for
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of
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this
 application and look forward to hearing from you. Should you need any
further
 details, please don't hesitate to call me. Yours faithfully Mansur
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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Task Achievement
To improve Task Achievement, ensure that you address all parts of the task directly and comprehensively. For example, provide more specific reasons for your suitability and clarify how your skills and experiences make you a good fit for the position.
Coherence and Cohesion
To enhance Coherence and Cohesion, consider organizing your letter into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a single main idea. This includes a separate introduction, one or more body paragraphs detailing your current situation, suitability, and availability for an interview, followed by a conclusion.
Task Achievement
For a more suitable Writing Tone, employing a more formal tone throughout your letter can enhance its professionalism. Avoid contractions ('i am' instead of 'I'm') and ensure proper capitalization of 'I' and other proper nouns.
General Advice
Improve spelling and grammar accuracy for clearer communication. Errors in spelling, punctuation, and grammar can detract from the professionalism of your letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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