You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Some people think that outdoor activities are more beneficial for children’s development than playing computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words.
It is true that one of the most important issues of today's society are very concerned about is the development of
children
. The question of whether doing outdoor activities for children
's development than playing computer games is a controversial one. From my personal standpoint, I totally agree with the former idea. In the following paragraphs, I would
give some reasons to support my argument.
One of the strongest arguments in Wrong verb form
will
this
case is that parents should let is their children
play sports
such
as tennis, football, or any sports
that their children
interested in at an early age which leads to a comprehensive possibility of them, including physical and mental health. Therefore
, those children
who take part in playing sports
also
have other benefits. For example
, when kids join in
a football team, they will have opportunities to communicate with their teammates. Change preposition
apply
Hence
, increasing relationships and learning and exchanging knowledge with each other.
Another point to help the convincing level of the statement is that it is undeniable the importance of doing exercise for kids. More specifically, not only do children
release sweat while
playing sports
but they also
will feel exhausted and desire to apply more food. Thus
, the children
who play sports
will have a better body than their peers due to
the amount of food consumed. Additionally
, spending time on
doing outdoor activities Change preposition
apply
also
helps children
avoid addicted to digital advances like laptops, mobile phones, tablets, etc.
In short, there are many ways to look at different sides of a matter and there have also
been opposite opinions in
Change preposition
on
this
particular topic. However
, the idea that playing outdoor activities are
more beneficial for Correct subject-verb agreement
is
children
's development is more likely to be agreed with.Submitted by aitam.dothi on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a good overall structure with clear paragraphs, an introduction, and a conclusion. However, you could improve the logical flow by making clearer connections between your ideas. Consider using more transitional phrases to guide the reader through your argument seamlessly.
task achievement
You've addressed the prompt effectively by taking a clear stance and supporting it with arguments. To enhance your task achievement score, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and is fully developed with detailed examples and explanations. Avoid general statements by incorporating specific, tangible examples to directly tie your arguments back to the question.
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