The pie chart below show the online shopping sales for retail sector in new Zealand in 2003 and 2013.

#show #sales #sector #zealand

The information about the commercial sector of

Newzealand

Correct your spelling

New Zealand

show examples

in terms of online selling of goods in 2003 and 2013 is depicted by given circular charts.

Overall

, the most striking feature of the given chart is that

major

Correct article usage

the major

show examples

margin in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

sales

came from online travel bookings in both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

years,

while

sales

from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

online shopping

Change preposition

apply

show examples

apparels

Fix the agreement mistake

apparel

show examples

in the latter year reduced to a greater extent. In terms of travel, people were more

fasinated

Correct your spelling

fascinated

with the online offers on travelling so the maximum

sales

were derived from

this

section (36% in 2003 and 29% in 2013).

Furthermore

, in 2013 selling movies and songs on online platforms generated a significant profit difference of 12% when

sales

in 2003 were merely 21%. Moving to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

further

details, individuals developed their interests in online book reading

with

Change preposition

show examples

passing

Correct article usage

the passing

show examples

years;

therefore

sales

of books bought through websites increased from 19% in 2003 to 22% in 2013.

However

, online clothing apps disappointed

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

customers

as a result

of which

sales

followed a dip to 16% in the year 2013.

Submitted by navkiranji on Fri Mar 15 2024

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words sales with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

175 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

pie chart
online shopping
retail sector
New Zealand
comparison
increase
shift
traditional
popularity
platforms
technology
internet access
consumer behavior
preferences
factors
growth
impact
brick-and-mortar stores
challenges
opportunities
future trends

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The pie chart below show the online shopping sales for retail sector in new Zealand in 2003 and 2013.

Many students choose to study at colleges and universities that are far away from the places where they grew up. Do the benefits of this outweigh the drawbacks?

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?

Write a letter to your friend. You have borrowed something from your friend and it got damaged. 1. Apologize for damaging the product 2. Explain what happened 3. Say how are you going to fix the issue

In some countries students pay their own college or university fees while in others, the government pay for them . Do you think the advantages that government pays the money outweigh the disadvantages .

Many people are afraid of leaving their homes because of their fear of crime. Some believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, but others feel that little can be done. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.