In some countries in Europe, some children from the age of 11 or 13 go to schools to learn more practical skills that will help them get a job. Other children stay in schools which provide a more general academic education. What should schools do to prepare students for the world of work?

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Introduction

Many

student

Change to a plural noun

students

show examples

in Europe

got

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show examples

to schools that

foucus

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focus

on the professional and technical

skill

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skills

show examples

so that they can play a creative role in the

socity

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society

Body paragraph 1

On the other

Linking Words

hand

Add a comma

hand,

show examples

some

school

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schools

show examples

provide

acadamic

Correct your spelling

academic

education

Use synonyms

thier

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their

students

Use synonyms

. so that they could be able to build a

usefull

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useful

citizen of the

socity

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society

Body paragraph 2

According to

Linking Words

perspactive

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perspective

, Both

type

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types

show examples

education

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have

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has

show examples

positive aspects.

Body paragraph 3

Firstly

Linking Words

school

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a school

the school

show examples

that pays attention

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show examples

professional

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

or provide technical

education

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students

Use synonyms

preparing

Wrong verb form

prepare

show examples

them not only

skillfull

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skilful

but

also

Linking Words

learn to complex case

study

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studies

show examples

and experiences.

this

Linking Words

will encourage them to solve real

problms

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problems

in no time.

Body paragraph 4

For example

Linking Words

, the school has provided a real situation and the student has

find

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found

show examples

out real

sulotions

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solutions

Body paragraph 5

Secondely

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Secondly

on the other hand

Linking Words

, schools

emphasis

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emphasise

show examples

cadamic

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academic

study,

privided

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provided

appourchunity for the

students

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to improve

thier knolodge

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their knowledge

about

differnt

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different

fields and areas. more

over

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apply

show examples

childern

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children

can learn how to research

knowlodge

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knowledge

and how to get

relvent

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relevant

and proper information.

Body paragraph 6

There is no doubt that both aspects are

esential

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essential

and preparing

childern

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children

for future responsibilities.

Body paragraph 7

But

Linking Words

according to

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show examples

my view,

scholls sould

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schools should

Add a missing verb

have more

show examples

emphisis

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emphasis

parctical

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practical

and technical

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

Although

Linking Words

acadamic

Correct your spelling

academic

education

Use synonyms

is very

importent

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important

for

students

Use synonyms

but if we want to give a

batter

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better

show examples

future and

intellegent

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intelligent

citizens to

this

Linking Words

world we should make it possible for all

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

educatin

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education

educational

institutions

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

they must focus on practical and technical

education

Use synonyms

along with

Linking Words

acaddamic

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academic

study. If schools have funding problems, government and

officicals

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officials

official

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should

could

would

sould

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should fulfil

fufill

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fulfil

all

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their

thier

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their

demands in

this

Linking Words

regard,

Conclusion

Lastly

Linking Words

, I

Correct your spelling

conclude

concluded

cunclude

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conclude

with the

Correct your spelling

statement

statment

Correct your spelling

statement

that technical

education

Use synonyms

is the only way through which we can prepare our

Correct your spelling

children

childern

Correct your spelling

children

for the world to work

computersinn2007

Mar 19, 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Try to organize your ideas logically, where each paragraph focuses on a specific point.

coherence cohesion

Focus on developing main points with specific examples or evidence. This strengthens the argument and makes your essay more persuasive.

task achievement

Address the essay prompt directly and ensure that you cover all aspects of the question. It's essential to provide a balanced view if the question requires it, then clearly state your own opinion.

general advice

Work on spelling, grammar, and punctuation. Regular practice and feedback can significantly improve these areas, leading to better clarity and professionalism in your writing.

general advice

Increase the variety of vocabulary used in your essay. Avoid repetition of words and phrases. Try to incorporate synonyms and related terms to express your ideas more vividly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
61
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

9 paragraphs

275 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

vocational training programs
curriculum
critical thinking
problem-solving
communication skills
career guidance
counseling
internships
apprenticeships
local industries
businesses
digital literacy
technological skills
entrepreneurship
innovation
financial literacy
budgeting
teamwork
collaboration

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In some countries in Europe, some children from the age of 11 or 13 go to schools to learn more practical skills that will help them get a job. Other children stay in schools which provide a more general academic education. What should schools do to prepare students for the world of work?

Nowadays, experience is more valued in the workplace than knowledge in many countries. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say it is OK to use animals for our benefit, others say it is not good to exploit them. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

Some companies have uniforms for their staff which must be worn at all times. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this.

Competitiveness is generally considered a good quality for people to have in society. Do you think it is a positive development or negative trend ? how ddoes competitiveness affect individuals?

These days the fashion in clothing are constantly changing. Is this affecting Individuals and the environment in a positive or a negative way