Some business observe that new employees who just graduated from a college or university seem to lack interpersonal skills needed for communication with their colleagues. What could be the reason for this? What solution can help address this problem?

These days, most young employees seem to not have the skills to communicate with their
colleagues
. Individualism and the habit of studying on their own could be the reasons for
this
problem. The solutions ,
however
, could be to encourage team spirit through
internship
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an internship
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during the studies or to organise seminaries at
work
to introduce them to the team. Individualism is the main issue of today's society which leads people to think and even to
work
on their own. Especially at university, students are used
studying
Change preposition
to studying
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and doing research by themselves.
In other words
, colleges or universities ask them to provide individual
work
to be able to mark them objectively.
For example
, when students have to make a presentation or take an exam, they do it without any help. Another reason to take into consideration is youth; when we are young, we are as not as confident as a mature person. We need to adapt to a new situation which can intimidate us.
For instance
, new
colleagues
, new tasks and new rules may fear most of us. Solutions could be found to solve
this
problem. Some companies organise some meetings or lunches with all employees in order to introduce new
colleagues
, which can encourage people to
work
and communicate together.
For example
, seminars or special outings are a good way to create a link between workers.
Not to mention
that
internship
Fix the agreement mistake
internships
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during studies have shown better employment after graduating and better adaptation to a new job. In conclusion, new employees who just graduated do not communicate easily with
colleagues
because of
being
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
used to
study
Wrong verb form
studying
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or
work
Wrong verb form
working
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alone.
However
, some solutions like encouraging team spirit
Change preposition
throughout
show examples
through
Change preposition
throughout
show examples
the company or during the studies
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
could be a smart manner to resolve
this
issue.
Submitted by leared on

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Task Achievement
To enhance task achievement, ensure your essay fully responds to all parts of the question. While you've covered the problem's causes and solutions, expanding on the impact of these solutions and providing more specific, detailed examples would deepen the reader's understanding. Consider discussing a broader range of perspectives and examples to make your argument more compelling.
Coherence and Cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on creating a more structured and seamless flow of ideas. This can be achieved by using a variety of transition phrases and ensuring each paragraph logically progresses from one idea to the next. Try to expand your paragraphs with more supporting sentences that connect back to the main point. It's also beneficial to have a clear thematic division between paragraphs to enhance readability.
Task Achievement
For a higher score, it's crucial to address both parts of the prompt fully and to develop your ideas more fully. This includes offering more insightful analysis and extending the discussion on why these issues arise and how the proposed solutions can effectively address them. Incorporating real-world examples or citing studies can add to the credibility and depth of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Utilize a wider range of linking phrases to enhance the flow of your essay. Experimenting with complex sentence structures can also add to the coherence of your argument. Remember to review your essay for any grammatical errors or awkward phrasing that could disrupt the reader's comprehension or the overall fluency of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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