The diagrams below show the life cycle of a specie of large fish called the salmon. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons where relavant.

The diagrams below show the life cycle of a specie of large fish called the salmon.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons where relavant.
the diagrams show the how
raising up
Verb problem
rise
show examples
and life cycle of a species of large
fish
called the
salmon
.
Add a missing verb
is.
show examples
overall
, fry is the smallest type of
fish
, it is only 3-8 cm. Smolt is
middle
Correct article usage
the middle
show examples
one type of. Adult
salmon
is the biggest
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
type of
fish
.
Fish
’s life cycle is very slow. Between fry to adult
salmon
spend approximately five years. Looking at the details, the first stage is
salmon
eggs
raise
Correct your spelling
rise
show examples
up
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
become small stones. Approximately 5-6 months
fish
is slow moving in
upper
Add an article
the upper
show examples
river. The second stage is approximately four years,fry is fast flowing in
lower
Add an article
the lower
show examples
river. The third stage is
fish
Rephrase
when fish
show examples
raise
Correct your spelling
rise
show examples
up
then
they
changed
Wrong verb form
change
show examples
which
Correct word choice
and
show examples
become big.
Submitted by buyabuya201 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 80%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words fish, salmon with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "slow" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: