IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The diagrams below show the life cycle of a specie of large fish called the salmon. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons where relavant.

The diagrams below show the life cycle of a specie of large fish called the salmon. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons where relavant.
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the diagrams show the how
raising up
Verb problem
rise
show examples
 and life cycle of a species of large
fish
Use synonyms
 called the
salmon
Use synonyms
.
Add a missing verb
is.
show examples
overall
Linking Words
, fry is the smallest type of
fish
Use synonyms
, it is only 3-8 cm. Smolt is
middle
Correct article usage
the middle
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 one type of. Adult
salmon
Use synonyms
 is the biggest
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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type of
fish
Use synonyms
.
Fish
Use synonyms
’s life cycle is very slow. Between fry to adult
salmon
Use synonyms
 spend approximately five years. Looking at the details, the first stage is
salmon
Use synonyms
 eggs
raise
Correct your spelling
rise
show examples
 up
Linking Words
then
Correct word choice
and then
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 become small stones. Approximately 5-6 months
fish
Use synonyms
 is slow moving in
upper
Add an article
the upper
show examples
 river. The second stage is approximately four years,fry is fast flowing in
lower
Add an article
the lower
show examples
 river. The third stage is
Use synonyms
fish
Rephrase
when fish
show examples
raise
Correct your spelling
rise
show examples
 up
then
Linking Words
 they
changed
Wrong verb form
change
show examples
which
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 become big.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 80%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words fish, salmon with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slow" was used 2 times.
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