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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The charts give information about the diet and general health of two groups of students. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts give information about the diet and general health of two groups of students. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #diet #health #two #groups #students #features #comparisons
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The juxtaposed table and pie chart demonstrate the information about the
diet
 and general health condition of individuals by percentage from
Group
 A and
B
 .
Overall
 , it is clear
while
 cereals are considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the most popular type of
diet
 in
Group
 A , the corresponding
diet
 for
Group
B
 is associated with food with
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
high fat
Add a hyphen
high-fat
show examples
 content. Both
Group
Fix the agreement mistake
Groups
show examples
 A and
B
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
accounted for the most popular tendency of attendance at classes . In terms of pie charts , it is obvious that there is a narrow disparity between
fruit
Correct article usage
the fruit
show examples
diet
 of
Group
 A and
Goup
Correct your spelling
Group
B
 by 3
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 5 and 8
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
, respectively . The cereals and fish
diet
 are almost the same with 35 and 5
percent
 ,
accordingly
 .There is a significant difference between people who prefer
vegetable
Correct article usage
a vegetable
show examples
diet
 between
Group
 A and
Group
B
. In terms of
table
Add an article
the table
a table
show examples
 , it is evident that
th emost
Correct your spelling
the most
 popular health activity both in
Group
 A and
B
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
accounted for attendance at classes which is nearly 90 and 75
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
, respectively .
Overweight
Add a missing verb
Being overweight
show examples
 problem is
also
 the second
prevalent
Correct quantifier usage
most prevalent
show examples
 health issue between
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
 A and
B
 with
former
Correct article usage
the former
show examples
standin
Correct your spelling
standing
stand in
standin'
gfirst
Correct your spelling
first
 with 10
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
 latter
20
Change preposition
with 20
show examples
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
Submitted by bhoswriting on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words diet, group, b, percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • dietary patterns
  • nutritional intake
  • carbohydrates
  • proteins
  • fast food consumption
  • health indicators
  • diet quality
  • beverages
  • sugary drinks
  • health outcomes
  • obesity
  • physical activity
  • fatigue
  • health maintenance
  • anomalies
  • trends
  • balance
  • comparison
  • correlation
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