The graph below shows the changing patterns of access to modern technology in homes in the UK ( expressed in percentage terms).

The graph below shows the changing patterns of access to modern technology in homes in the UK ( expressed in percentage terms).
The graph provides us
information
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with information
show examples
about domestic access to four modern
technology
Fix the agreement mistake
technologies
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in the
last
decades. There are mainly several types of trends that include
steadily
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steady
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rise and
gradually
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gradual
show examples
advance
Correct subject-verb agreement
advances
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with a
side by side
Add a hyphen
side-by-side
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comparison. As regards the
first,
CD player access has been
arised
Correct your spelling
raised
steadily. Making it one of
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
accessible
technology
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technologies
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in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
home
usage
.
However
,internet access made dramatically small
improvement
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improvements
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in comparison between all four
technology
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technologies
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.
By contrast
,
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
two technologies showed
less
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fewer
show examples
use percentages than
CD
Correct article usage
the CD
show examples
player
Fix the agreement mistake
players
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,but
also
had a slightly different line in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
graph.There was a small
fluctuations
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fluctuation
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in mobile phone
usage
line. Improving from 20% to 45% in 2000/01 and going without drop to 70%
usage
in 2002/03. Home
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
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rose gradually from 30% to 55% of
usage
,making it
most
Correct article usage
the most
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stable
rose
Verb problem
apply
show examples
technology
between
Change preposition
among
show examples
 all of them.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words technology, usage with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "comparison" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological advancements
  • digital divide
  • accessibility
  • ubiquitous computing
  • smart home devices
  • telecommunication
  • multi-purpose gadgets
  • innovation
  • connectivity
  • obsolete
  • trend analysis
  • consumer electronics
  • statistical data
  • percentile growth
  • demographics
  • chart interpretation
  • gadgets
  • integration
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