The graph below shows the changing patterns of access to modern technology in homes in the UK ( expressed in percentage terms).
The graph provides information about internal access trends to advanced technology
There are two basic general trends with and without fluctuation. As regards to
first,
Linking Words
Mobile
phone’s trend Correct article usage
the Mobile
was
rose gradually from almost 20% to just 25%, Unnecessary verb
apply
then
started Linking Words
fluctuated
suddenly.
Wrong verb form
fluctuating
By contrast
, the access for the other three Linking Words
technologys
went up almost in the same pattern. There was Correct your spelling
technologies
technology
constant
upward in Correct article usage
a constant
CD
Add an article
the CD
a CD
player
, starting from 60%. The trend for the Home computer was similar to the CD player. Admission to home Fix the agreement mistake
players
computer
increased gradually and steadily every year. Fix the agreement mistake
computers
Likewise
, the Internet access’s tendency is upward, with Linking Words
sudden
climb from almost 10%.
It ıs noticeable, Add an article
a sudden
the sudden
the
admission for Internet access began later than for the other three innovations.Correct word choice
that the
Submitted by dnm.best on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: The word "trends" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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