The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 201 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 201 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.
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The graph illustrates
comparison
Add an article
a comparison
the comparison
show examples
between
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of shop
closures
Use synonyms
and openings in one country from 2011 to 2018. Depending on
reported
Add an article
the reported
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information, 2011
has
Wrong verb form
had
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the highest rate of openings
of
Change preposition
apply
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8500
while
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
number dramatically declined by
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
2018,
while
Linking Words
closures
Use synonyms
perform
Wrong verb form
performed
show examples
constantly changing results.
While
Linking Words
opening rates of shops exceed the
closures
Use synonyms
by 2000 difference, it
become
Change the verb form
becomes
show examples
undeniable to expect
downfall
Correct article usage
a downfall
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trend of 4000 within a year.Increasing results survived till 2014 were both opening and closers had similar rates of over 6000. For the end of
2018
Add a comma
2018,
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the number of shops that opened hit its lowest by 3000. Closure numbers
od
Correct your spelling
of
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shops had drastically changing performance as it began with around 6300 in 2011,
Linking Words
however
Add the comma(s)
however,
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tragic decrease
happed
Correct your spelling
happen
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in 2015 by 500
closures
Use synonyms
.
In between
Change preposition
Between
show examples
2016
till
Correct word choice
and
show examples
2018 steady rates become 5000.
Submitted by musayevjahangir on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words closures with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuate
  • steady
  • decline
  • increase
  • peak
  • trough
  • magnitude
  • trend
  • surpass
  • plummet
  • annual
  • consecutive
  • closure rate
  • inception rate
  • net growth
  • commercial landscape
  • retail sector
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