big salary is more important than job satisfaction. do you agree or disagree?

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In
this
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cutting-edge era, there is one of the highly controversial
issue
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issues
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whether
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of whether
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high income
have
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has
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much significance as compared to
job
Use synonyms
satisfaction
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. I disagree with the given notion and the supporting points will be discussed in the subsequent paragraphs. To commence with, becoming
more rich
Replace the words
richer
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could be the first reason for giving much importance to big
slalary
Correct your spelling
salary
. To elaborate
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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,
people
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having low
income
Fix the agreement mistake
incomes
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could not
be fulfilled
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fulfil
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their family's needs and dreams
such
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as good educational institutions, healthy
environment
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environments
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, recreational
sources
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resources
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and other basic needs.
Apart from
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this
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, high wages are becoming a necessity for achieving name and fame in own locality. To clarify
this
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,
people
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think that if they have an expensive car, a two-storey building for living, luxuries and branded clothes
then
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they can earn good fame in their society easily. To illustrate
this
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, a survey
has been
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was
show examples
conducted
last
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year which depicts 80%
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people
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of people
show examples
apply
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apply for
show examples
jobs with high earnings
instead
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of looking
on
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at
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pros
Correct article usage
the pros
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and cons of those jobs.
However
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,
job
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satisfaction
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cannot be underestimated. When
people
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do fulfilling
Use synonyms
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
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then
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not only makes the workday more enjoyable, but
also
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they tend to be more committed to their jobs,
more
Correct word choice
and more
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creative ; has
led
Wrong verb form
leads
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to
overall
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progress of their career advancement and success in the long run.
In addition
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to
this
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, it could be seen that a
Use synonyms
satisfaction
Replace the word
satisfying
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job
Use synonyms
also
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contributes to an individual's mental and social
well being
Add a hyphen
well-being
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.
For example
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,
people
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love what they are doing and share their
fellings
Correct your spelling
feelings
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of happiness and sadness
among
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with
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other colleagues which
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
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them to maintain
balance
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a balance
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their
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in their
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work-life.
To conclude
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, It has been said that
although
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there are
multifariuos
Correct your spelling
multifarious
beneficial points of doing with high income like financial security and a
well renowed
Add a hyphen
well-renowed
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life,
job
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satisfaction
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plays a pivotal role in
overall
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happiness and productivity.
Submitted by deepnimrat553 on

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Clarity & Simplicity
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Linking Words
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Examples & Evidence
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Topic Relevance
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Balanced Discussion
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Essay Structure
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Language Variety
You have a good range of vocabulary and grammatical structures which enriches your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • remuneration
  • financial security
  • motivation
  • luxuries
  • material possessions
  • fulfillment
  • work-life balance
  • stress levels
  • mental well-being
  • job security
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