some people think that it is best to save money for example in a bank or savings schemes. other people feel that money should be spent whenever it is available. Discuss these views and reach an opinion on this debate.
Over the
last
few years, the number of people
who prefer to some people
think money
save
very Wrong verb form
saving
good
Change the word
well
thus
they are good think idea
has increased significantly. Fix the agreement mistake
ideas
Although
there are several advantages of some people
think that it is best to save money
for
example
saving schemes, it can have disadvantages as well. In this
essay
I will try to discuss both Add a comma
essay,
positive
and negative sides of Correct article usage
the positive
this
and draw a conclusion.
On the one hand, there are several benefits of any people
idea that it is best to save Change noun form
people's
money
for
example
in a bank. The first merit of it is considered to be that it is
Change the verb form
is placed
place
very safe and durable thus
I trust you to be able to pour your money
into this
bang. For
example
, in this
place
you know that Add a comma
place,
this
place
is the best where your money
gets dry at night. Another positive aspect is thought to be that in this
place
your money
is a year thursday
in which twenty-five Change the capitalization
Thursday
percent
a year is connected to Change the spelling
per cent
this
bank account so that you make a profit. This
is because convenient and economical in all respects.
On the other hand
, despite mentioned
positives, other Correct article usage
the mentioned
people
feel that money
should be spent whenever it is available. One of the major disadvantages of it is that this
money
spent
very much Add a missing verb
is spent
place
and need for food. Change preposition
in place
For
example
, this
man takes everything from money
other
things. Another important demerit is that Change preposition
to other
any
Correct your spelling
many
people
feel that money
should be spent whenever it is available. This
is because these things are bad for everyone as well as
these cubes bring a difficult task to the person.
In conclusion, while
other people
feel that money
should be spent whenever it is available can offer several positives, there may be some drawbacks too. From my personal point of view advantages
of Correct article usage
the advantages
this
will outweigh the disadvantages.Submitted by soglomovsarvar on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay provides an attempt to discuss both sides of the argument and reach a conclusion, which is good. However, the overall clarity and expression of your ideas could be improved. It's essential to present your arguments in a more structured and coherent manner to enhance the logical flow of information.
Task Achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure your response fully addresses all parts of the task. This includes a clearer distinction between the two views and a more detailed examination of each. Providing specific examples to support your arguments could also strengthen your response.
Introduction/Conclusion Clarity
Your introduction and conclusion are present but could be clearer in stating the topic and summarizing your opinion. This would help in making a stronger impact on the reader.
Engagement with Topic
You engaged with the topic by presenting both sides of the debate, which is a positive aspect of your essay.
Attempt to Support Arguments
Your effort to include examples, although needing clarity, shows an attempt to support your arguments.