Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects . Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
It is considered by some
university
students
that doing extra-curricular activities together with
the curriculum make
their school Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
life
more enjoyable, while
for others, concentrating on study
is more crucial than anything else as they aim for good jobs and Fix the agreement mistake
studies
making
money. As for me, I think learning more Wrong verb form
make
subjects
along with
the main subject is more beneficial.
Firstly
, university
life
is one of the happiest times in a student
Change noun form
student's
life
as they have no limitation
or Fix the agreement mistake
limitations
restriction
for anything. At the same time, they can pursue their hobbies with proper time management. After finishing Fix the agreement mistake
restrictions
the
college, most of them have to do jobs and earn for themselves and their family. So, before jumping Correct article usage
apply
to
Change preposition
into
an
adult Remove the article
apply
life
, they should learn other subjects
like music, dance or sport whatever they are interested in. By doing so, they won’t have any regrets later in their life
. For example
, most university
students
in UK
Correct article usage
the UK
do
Verb problem
have
the
extra-curricular Correct article usage
apply
subject
at least Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
one
after the Correct your spelling
once
covid
era.
Correct your spelling
COVID
On the other hand
, some students
are very ambitious and only concentrate on achieving good score
in their Fix the agreement mistake
scores
subjects
because they may have other plan
for their Change the wording
another plan
other plans
life
. Their goal is to secure their future with good job
and proper Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
earning
for which better qualification is needed. To illustrate, those, who are doing 9-5 jobs are generally Fix the agreement mistake
earnings
this
type of people.
In conclusion, life
in university
is one of the most important periods for a person, as they can do whatever they want, and I think learning new things at this
time will add-up
more skills in them. So, Correct your spelling
add up
students
should concentrate on their main subjects
as well as
doing extra-curricular activities will bring a bright future.Submitted by nmpppp4444 on
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Examples
Expand your range of examples to strengthen your argument. While the UK university example is good, incorporating a broader range of examples could provide a more compelling argument.
Analysis
Work on deepening your analysis of the opposing viewpoint. Acknowledge the validity of focusing solely on studies but explore in more depth why a balanced approach might be more beneficial for most students.
Structure
You've structured your essay clearly, with a good introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which makes your argument easy to follow.
Opinion Integration
Your personal opinion is well-integrated and clear, providing a good balance between discussing both views and stating your own position.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.