The pie charts below show the propotions of visits to Ireland last year by age group, and by gender and type of visit. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#show #propotions #visits #ireland #year #age #group #gender #type #visit #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The two pie charts

illustrates

Change the verb form

illustrate

show examples

the amount of tourists who visited Ireland

according to

three different categories

such

age

, gender and type of visit.

Overall

it can be seen that the percentage of women and men who

spend

Wrong verb form

spent

show examples

their leisure time in Ireland

last

year

was much more

thar

Correct your spelling

than

business purposes. Examining the details, the first pie chart shows that

Irelant

Correct your spelling

Ireland

was the most attractive destination for the 25-34 years olds and the 45-54

age

group with 23%

last

year

This

number was only 19% for the 35-44

age

group and both

Correct your spelling

the 16-24

the16-24

Correct your spelling

the 16-24

and the 66 years and over groups have

Correct article usage

a 9

show examples

Correct article usage

a 9

show examples

% share.

Also

Add a comma

Also,

show examples

the 0-15 and the 55-65

age

categories with 6% and 9% respectively were the least visitors

last

year

On the other hand

, the second pie chart demonstrates that

most

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

both men and women tended to visit

this

country

for spending

Change preposition

to spend

show examples

their leisure time by

approximatly

Correct your spelling

approximately

40%

last

year

and just around 13% of men came for

business

Add an article

a business

show examples

visit

while

this

rate was 4% for women.

Submitted by m.tavasoli18 on Wed May 01 2024

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words age, year with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.

▼

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

170 words

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The pie charts below show the propotions of visits to Ireland last year by age group, and by gender and type of visit. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

As the world has become technologically advanced, computer are replacing more and more jobs that maybe lose because of computer. Discuss at least one problem that may result.

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships that people make? Has this been a positive or negative development?

Whether or not someone achieves their aims is mostly by a question of luck.

plastic shopping bags contribute to the pollution of air and sea. Some people think they should be banned. Do you agree or disagree ?

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think his is an appropriate use of government money?