IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

The line graph below shows the percentage of tourists to England who visited four different attractions in Brighton. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph below shows the percentage of tourists to England who visited four different attractions in Brighton. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The graph illustrates the proportion of
visitors
Use synonyms
 who travelled to four various places in Brighton.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the proportion of
visitors
Use synonyms
 who visited the Pavilion and Pier increased over the period shown, and the number of
visitors
Use synonyms
 who were attracted by the Art Gallery and festival fell steadily. Between 1980 and 1995, people who visited the Pavilion rose from around 24% to a peak of nearly 50% attractions. During the same period, the proportion of
visitors
Use synonyms
 travelling to the art gallery sharply increased to 38% and fell sharply to around 20%.
While
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 Pier rose slightly to just above 10%, the number of
visitors
Use synonyms
 who were attracted by the festival dropped gradually from 30% to 25%. In 2010, the percentage of
visitors
Use synonyms
 who went to the Pavilion went down to around 30% but the Pier doubled from 11% in 1995 to approximately 22%.
By contrast
Linking Words
, people who visited the act gallery decreased significantly to less than 10%.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the number of
visitors
Use synonyms
 who were attracted to the festival increased slowly to 27% and remained stable.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fell" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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