IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree?

#salary #job #satisfaction
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It is often argued that it is more advantageous to choose a
job
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 with high
payment
Replace the word
pay
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 even if it doesn't call to you at all. I completely
dis agree
Correct your spelling
disagree
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 with
this
Linking Words
opinon
Correct your spelling
opinion
 and think that
job
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situationis
Correct your spelling
situation is
situations
 much more
importent
Correct your spelling
important
 than
salary
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. First of all, I believe that
job
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satisfaction
Use synonyms
 that no money can connect. Even if someone is entering a high
salary
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. but feels tired and meets another short way.
This
Linking Words
 person won't enjoy his life
while
Linking Words
 pursuing
satisfaction
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 in one interests and will always bring pleasure and feelings for
satisfaction
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.
For example
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, a lot of famous researchers make their career choices not because of
salary
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. But since they were passionate about science.
That is
Linking Words
 why it is more important to choose the kind of work that makes you happy than to look only for a high
salary
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.
Secondly
Linking Words
, doing with you like keeps you motivated and
therefore
Linking Words
tear
Verb problem
adds
show examples
 to career developments.
In other words
Linking Words
, there is a strong relationship between
job
Use synonyms
satisfaction
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 and
effective
Replace the word
effectiveness
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. People who love their
job
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 can easily in their folds of work and
achive
Correct your spelling
achieve
 better teasalt than choose. Who put
salary
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 in the first place?
For instance
Linking Words
, Henry Miller decided to leave his
job
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 with a good
salary
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 and travel to become one of the most famous and well-paid writers of the twentieth century. The advantages of a
job
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 that keeps you satisfied more than a low
salary
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 in a
job
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. In conclusion, I strongly believe that
job
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satisfaction
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 is more beneficial than
salary
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 because it makes people happy and motivated.
Submitted by ma.ushamanu1024 on

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Grammar and Clarity
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Vocabulary
Use a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely and to make your argument more compelling.
Content Depth
Develop your arguments further with more specific examples and explanations to strengthen your position and make your essay more persuasive.
Structure
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively present your viewpoint on the topic, making your position known from the start.
Argument Support
You've provided relevant examples to support your arguments, which helps in making your essay more informative and convincing.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • remuneration
  • financial security
  • motivation
  • luxuries
  • material possessions
  • fulfillment
  • work-life balance
  • stress levels
  • mental well-being
  • job security
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