IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

you have been offered a job that will require you to move to a city that you have never visited before. You have a friend who lives there. Write a letter to your friend. in your letter. -explain your situation. -say why you feel unsure about living in the city. -ask some questions about life in the city.

#job #move #city #friend #lives #-explain #situation #-say #-ask #questions #life
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Dear John, I hope you and the family are in the pink of health. I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to seek your advice about moving to
Use synonyms
brisbane
Change the capitalization
Brisbane
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 for
job
Add an article
the job
a job
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. I have received
job
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a job
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 offer from Clark and Connor LLC as
system
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a system
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 engineer. I have heard many stories about crimes in downtown
Brisbane
Use synonyms
 after 6 pm. I am unsure about
quality
Add an article
the quality
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 of life in
Brisbane
Use synonyms
.
As
Correct word choice
apply
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I am confused
whether
Change preposition
about whether
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 to accept the offer or reject it.
Linking Words
Furthermore
Add a comma
Furthermore,
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 rentals in good suburbs are
sky rocketing
Correct your spelling
skyrocketing
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 high. Please advise me about
quality
Correct article usage
the quality
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 of life from crimes and
cost
Correct article usage
the cost
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 of living in
Brisbane
Use synonyms
. As you are
Correct article usage
a localite
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localite
Correct your spelling
locality
 you have
pretty
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a pretty
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 good idea about city culture and quality of life with
regards
Fix the agreement mistake
regard
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 to housing rent,
crime
Correct word choice
and crime
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 reports across
Brisbane
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. please guide me
whether
Change preposition
on whether
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 to take that job or reject it. As I am unsure about
city
Add an article
the city
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 of
Brisbane
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. I am hoping for
quick
Add an article
the quick
a quick
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 reply. Cheers, JIM
Submitted by yash334 on

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Task Achievement
Ensure that your letter addresses all parts of the task in a clear and well-structured manner. You've done well to include personal concerns and queries, but adding more detail about the job and its implications could make your response even more compelling.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your letter flows nicely from one idea to the next, which is great. For an even stronger structure, you could consider using more varied sentence structures and transitions to guide the reader through your letter more smoothly.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your letter has a clear structure, separating your current situation, concerns, and questions effectively.
Task Achievement
You've maintained a suitable tone throughout the letter, which fits the informal context of writing to a friend.
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