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Band 5.5

The line graph shows visits to and from the UK from 1979 to 1999. The bar chart shows the most popular countries visited by UK residents in 1999.

The line graph shows visits to and from the UK from 1979 to 1999. The bar chart shows the most popular countries visited by UK residents in 1999.
#line #visits #uk #bar #countries #residents
The line graph illustrates
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of
UK
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
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 who had visited foreign countries
as well as
 how many
visitors
had
Verb problem
there were to
show examples
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 from other states between 1979 to 1999. The bar chart provides information about 5 top states visited by British
residents
 in 1999.
Overall
, it can be seen that there was an increase in the number of
visitors
 to and from the
UK
 and there were more
visits
 abroad by
UK
residents
 than
visits
 to the
UK
 by overseas
residents
 over the period.
Furthermore
, the most popular country to
ovisit
Correct your spelling
visit
 by
UK
residents
 was France in 1999.
According to
 the line graph
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the
begining
Correct your spelling
beginning
 of the period about 10-12
milion
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million
UK
 citizens
traveled
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travelled
show examples
 abroad and
then
 rose steadily to 20
milion
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million
 of
visitors
 to
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
show examples
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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, before reaching the
pick
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peak
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 of over 50 million
visits
 by
UK
residents
 in 1999. In comparison to that
visits
 to
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 by overseas
residents
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
approximatelly
Correct your spelling
approximately
 10
millions
Change to singular
million
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 in 1979 and after that period experienced
slight
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a slight
show examples
 increase and
then
 rose sharply to about 30
millionn
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million
visitors
 in 1999.
Moreover
, France was the most preferred
destiantion
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destination
 for
UK
residents
 in 1999 followed by Spain,USA and Greece.
Meanwhile
Add a comma
Meanwhile,
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 Turkey was the less attractive destination
choosen
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chosen
choose
 to visit by British people.
Submitted by yuzgeademova2001 on

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the sixth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words uk, visitors, residents, visits with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the sixth paragraph.
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