the bar chart below shows the percentage of australian men and m=women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010 summarise the information

IELTS Writing Task Chart for the bar chart below shows the percentage of australian men and m=women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010 summarise the information

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The bar graph illustrates the proportion of people in Australia of various ages who worked out regularly in 2010.

Overall

Linking Words

, most of the men who tended to be physically active were youngsters,

while

Linking Words

the least number were in their mid-thirties to mid-forties. Reversely, most of the women who regularly did physical activities were in their mid-forties to mid-fifties,

whereas

Linking Words

the least number were the elderly. Based on the statistics, more than half of the population of boys and young adult men (52.8%) engaged in sports. The rate gradually declined to 38.5% at 35 to 44

years

Use synonyms

old, and

then

Linking Words

slowly increased up to 46.7% for people older than 64

years

Use synonyms

old.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, less than half of the girl population (47.7%) loved to do sports.

This

Linking Words

ratio rapidly increased in the next few age groups, reaching its peak point at 53.3% for those 45–54

years

Use synonyms

old. That condition was slightly different with the before and after age groups, each at 52.5% and 53%, respectively. It

finally

Linking Words

ended up with 47.1% at more than 64

years

Use synonyms

old.

mayaanita.studiFri May 10 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Replace the words years with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

178 words

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the bar chart below shows the percentage of australian men and m=women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010 summarise the information

Some people think that illegal Internet downloads are having a negative effect on the music industry. Others feel that have little or no impact on artists. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects. Other people thimk that, in today's world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important tham History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things.Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it

Some people believe that children who are brought up in families which don't have large amounts of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children brought up in wealthier families. To what extent do you agree or disagree.