The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

#bar #percentage #australian #men #women #age #groups #activity #summarise #information #features #comparisons

‏

This

report derives from a bar chart which illustrates the Number of males and

femals

Correct your spelling

females

from

diferent

Correct your spelling

different

generatia

Correct your spelling

generation

generate

Correct pronoun usage

who do

show examples

Wrong verb form

did

show examples

Some exercise for

thier

Correct your spelling

their

body they

live

Wrong verb form

lived

show examples

in Australia in 2010 .

Overall

, There was

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

different age groups from 15 to 65

andover

Correct your spelling

and over

Andover

According to

Correct article usage

the data

show examples

data

Add a comma

data,

show examples

It is clear that

the

men

have

Correct your spelling

the

highest percentage of all the dye

exsert

Correct your spelling

except

show examples

the age

Change preposition

of 15

show examples

to 24 the

women

was

Correct subject-verb agreement

were

show examples

the

highat

Correct your spelling

highest

one

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

. to

compering

Verb problem

compare

show examples

with

men

and

women

underage is to 24 the

women

have 52.8 .

while

men

47.7 from the other side of the graph , the

men

and there was almost

etule

Correct your spelling

equal

between

men

and

women

underage

Correct your spelling

under age

show examples

65 and over we saw the a slightly different which is just 0.1 Percent .

Moreover

, the group of Age between

men

and

women

from 25 to 34 Wen had 48.4

while

women

had 42.2. On the final note of Comparison ,

Women

and

men

from 35 until 64 the

men

Who doing regular Phosical

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

more than

Women

Submitted by fahadsalem169 on Fri May 10 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.

▼

Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.

▼

Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women with synonyms.

▼

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

172 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Percentage
Australian men
Australian women
Age groups
Regular physical activity
Participated
Increased
Decreased
Proportion
Physically active
Gender difference
Engaged
Exercise

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The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

The length of vacation that employees enjoy each year varies from job to job. Do you think people should have the same number of holidays regardless of their occupation? Explain your answer.

Some people consider price as the most important thing to think about when buying a product (such as a cell phone) or service (medical treatment). Do you agree or disagree?

It is not necessary for people to travel to other places to learn about the culture. We can learn as much as from books, films and the internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?