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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The bar chart shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2021. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2021. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #ten #countries #production #consumption #electricity #information #features #comparisons
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The bar graph
discuss
Change the verb form
discusses
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 the statistics rank of the electricity amount produced and consumed by ten different
countries
Use synonyms
 in 2021.
Overall
Linking Words
 ,
Correct article usage
the unitaded
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unitaded
Correct your spelling
united
 states and
china
Capitalize word
China
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that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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are developing
countries
Use synonyms
 faced
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
excessive
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
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 in production and consumption
electricity
Change preposition
of electricity
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 in 2021 ,
while
Linking Words
 other
coutries
Correct your spelling
countries
 are
very
Rephrase
much
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 less,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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shows huge differences with considerable
gap
Fix the agreement mistake
gaps
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.
In addition
Linking Words
 , we can notice that there is no clear difference between producing and consuming electric
power
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 in the 10
countries
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 .
Marover
Correct your spelling
Moreover
, the number
produces
Change preposition
of produced
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electricy
Correct your spelling
electricity
for
Change preposition
in
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US
Correct article usage
the US
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 and
china
Capitalize word
China
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 are nearly the same for 4099 and 5398 respectively .
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the quantity of
cosuming
Correct your spelling
consumption
 in these
countries
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 3866 and 5322 for each of them .
In contrast
Linking Words
, the left eight
countries
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 have less electricity production and consumption that never
exceed
Correct subject-verb agreement
exceeds
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 1057 in producing
power
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 and no more than 1038 .
Linking Words
Further more
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
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, the lowest country was
korea
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Korea
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in
Change preposition
with
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 485.1 producing
power
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 and 449.5 consuming
power
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 . We can note that all these eight
countries
Use synonyms
 faced
approximatly
Correct your spelling
approximately
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 numbers of production and
cosumption
Correct your spelling
consumption
.
Submitted by sohad_saad2005 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words countries, power with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "differences" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • dual aspect
  • electricity production
  • electricity consumption
  • industrial base
  • population size
  • significant difference
  • surplus
  • deficit
  • electrical energy
  • ranking
  • economic patterns
  • industrial patterns
  • technological advancements
  • disparity
  • industrial development
  • economic capabilities
  • anomalies
  • export
  • import
  • energy efficiency
  • waste
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