IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The table below shows the change in number of people engaged in various physical activities between the years 2001-2009 in Australia (in million people). Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the change in number of people engaged in various physical activities between the years 2001-2009 in Australia (in million people). Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#change #people #activities #years #australia #million #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given table illustrates the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who joined various workouts in Australia and how much it changed from 2001 to 2009. Units are measured in million
people
Use synonyms
 and percentages (the change).
Overall
Linking Words
, it can clearly be seen that swimming is a
sport
Use synonyms
 that becomes a favourite over time
although
Linking Words
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 engaged experienced a fluctuation.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the trend for the other three sports (running, aerobics, and tennis) rose throughout the given period,
while
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 who like cycling decreased. In terms of the
sport
Use synonyms
 which
people
Use synonyms
 enjoyed the most, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who do swimming started at 3.7 in the first year as we can see in the second column
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the sixth row.
Thereafter
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 witnessed a little growth to 3.8 in 2005 (look at the third column).
However
Linking Words
, in the
last
Linking Words
 period, the total of
people
Use synonyms
 who like to swim went down by 0.5. From
this
Linking Words
 fluctuation, the change of
people
Use synonyms
 engaged in swimming degraded 10% in total. Regarding the other types of physical activities, running, aerobics and tennis had
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 same trend,
while
Linking Words
 cycling is the one
sport
Use synonyms
 in which the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 engaged declined. In 2001, running, aerobics and tennis stood at 1.4, 1.5, and 1, respectively. In the following years, they only grew a little by around 0.1-0.5.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 engaged in cycling began at 4.5 before going down to 3.1 in 2005.
Then
Linking Words
 the
number
Use synonyms
 rose by 0.5 in 2009. If we look closer
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the table, we
can
Verb problem
apply
show examples
know that the
sport
Use synonyms
 which has the biggest change in trend is running at 156%.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words number, people, sport with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
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