Many countries raise fuel prices in order to deal successfully with problems pertaining to traffic and pollution. What effects do you think this move can have? What other measures do you think can be taken to reduce traffic and pollution?

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World has been suffering
with
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from

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the burning issue of
traffic
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congestion and its
deterimetal
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detrimental

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effects on the environment. As a part of
solution
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the solution

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, certain nations have increased
fuel
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rates.
However
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, I personally hold a belief that the higher
fuel
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cost can not be a solution
insead
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instead

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it enhancing unnecessary financial burden among
people
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. Regarding that, I
opines
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opine

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Correct article usage
the

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Government can impose other
fuel
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alternatives to deal with the
traffic
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concerns.
To begin
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with, If the
fuel
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prices
raised
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are raised

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by the authorities to tackle
with
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apply

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traffic
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issues,
people
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have to empty their pockets to commute from one place to another
that
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which

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contributes
in
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to

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developing the
econimical
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economical
economic

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stress among them.
Additionally
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, because of lacking of public transportation facilities, they don't have any other
alteranatives
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alternatives
alternative

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for transportation which
make
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makes

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them
force
Wrong verb form
forced

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to rely on private
vehicals
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vehicles

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.
Thus
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, no matter how much the cost of the
fuel
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, they have to purchase it which significantly
affect
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affects

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their mental health by boosting
thier
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their

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financial stress level. To cite an example, a recent survey reveals that, in 2018,
Indian
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the Indian

The noun phrase Indian government seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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government
had
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb had appears to be unnecessary here.

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increasesed
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increased

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the
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apply

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petrol prices to
reduces
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reduce

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the
numner
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number

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of private
vehicals
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vehicles

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on the road.
Surprisigly
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Surprisingly

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, the number of
vehicals
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vehicles

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remained same but the 75% of folks were
facinging
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facing

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financial
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a financial

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crisis
as a result
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of
spike
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a spike
the spike

The noun phrase spike seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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in
petrol
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the petrol

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rate. Talking about the alternatives to control
traffic
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and pollution,
government
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the government

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should enhance the facilities of
the
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apply

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public
transportaion
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transportation

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. In
perticular
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particular

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, it has been evident that a large number of
emplyees
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employees

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living
in
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on

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Add an article
the country

The noun phrase country side seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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country side
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countryside

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are opting
private
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for private

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cars to commute to the office as there are no buses in their area. To tackle
this
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,
a
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the

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frequency of buses
as well as
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the number of bus routes should be
increase
Wrong verb form
increased

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb increase. Consider changing it.

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by national leaders. Because, if it is convenient for
people
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to catch the buses
on
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at

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their desired time, it will eliminate the need
of purchasing
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to purchase

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private
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a private
the private

The noun phrase private vehicle seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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vehicle.
For instance
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,
majority
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the majority

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of
people
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in
UK
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the UK

Your article usage with the geographic name UK may be incorrect.

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which is
reknown
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known
renown

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for its excellent public
trasportation
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transportation

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services do not buy individual cars to commute.
To conclude
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, making the
fuel
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prices high
become
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becomes

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a major contributory factor in hiking the stress level among
public
Correct article usage
the public

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rather than helping in
traffic
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deduction and decreasing
pollusion
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pollution

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.
Therefore
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, adopting
an alternatives
Correct the article-noun agreement
alternatives
an alternative

The indefinite article an may not be required with the plural noun alternatives in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as advancing the bus transportation services can become a powerful remedy.

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Grammar and Spelling
There are several spelling errors in the essay. For instance, 'deterimetal' should be 'detrimental', 'econimical' should be 'economical', 'althought' should be 'although', 'facinating' should be 'fascinating', and 'vehicals' should be 'vehicles'. It's important to proofread your work to avoid these mistakes.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay would benefit from stronger linking words to guide the reader. Although you have used 'To begin with' and 'To conclude,' which are good, incorporating words and phrases like 'Moreover,' 'Furthermore,' and 'In addition' can improve coherence.
Task Achievement
You have provided relevant specific examples, but they can be more smoothly integrated into your main arguments. Make sure they directly support your claims.
Structure
Your essay is well-organized, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Task Achievement
The main points are supported with examples, which adds weight to your arguments.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • 1. Renewable energy
  • 2. Fuel-efficient
  • 3. Congestion
  • 4. Low-emission vehicles
  • 5. Non-motorized transport
  • 6. Technological advancements
  • 7. Economic burden
  • 8. Subsidies
  • 9. Tax incentives
  • 10. Public transportation infrastructure
  • 11. Dedicated cycling lanes
  • 12. Pedestrian pathways
  • 13. Congestion charges
  • 14. Remote working
  • 15. Green urban planning
  • 16. Mixed-use areas
  • 17. Higher-density living
  • 18. Investment
  • 19. Alternative energy sources
  • 20. Environmental impact
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