Today more and more people want things instantly(eg:goods,service,news).Why is this?Is this positive or negative development?

In the present day,the majority of
people
all want instant things
thus
wanting to have immediate results.
This
author believes that
this
is a negative phenomenon
due to
causing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
annoying between
people
and wasting money
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
fast
ship
Fix the agreement mistake
ships
show examples
. It must be understood that focusing on immediate results has a negative impact on
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
.It means they are always in expected condition so they easily lose their patient.
Consequently
,easy to angry and not be patient with anything or anyone.
For instance
,a citizen who in the expected conditions is easy to lose their mind because they are impatient with everything and they easy to become angry
as well as
cannot study or work. Another factor that wants things instantly is
negative
Add an article
a negative
show examples
development because it easily wastes money.
In other words
,the service of ships increasing and a lot of companies are in the market
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which is the fastest dispatch to customers.
Therefore
,wasting a lot of capital to receive the conduct.
For example
,when
people
buy a product for just a little bill but if they want to have it immediately,they have to pay a lot of money to be a priority to ship.
However
, wanting things instantly has some positive
impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
show examples
like growing more fastly.
In other words
,
people
are growing up every day so they become better and better each day.
Therefore
,develop the country
as well as
the world.
For example
,they are always busy to grow up the world more fastly and improve the facilities.
To sum up
,growing more fastly is outweighed by wasting
bill
Fix the agreement mistake
bills
show examples
and causing the annoying.
Hence
, the world creates some troubles and makes
people
's minds about it.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
The introduction touches on the idea that wanting instant things is a negative phenomenon, but it should be clearer. Try to explicitly state the main points that the essay will address.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph sticks to a single idea. This will help improve the logical flow and coherence of your essay.
task achievement
The examples provided are somewhat vague and generic. Specific and concrete examples will make your argument more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Work on creating smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs to improve the overall flow of the essay.
task achievement
You have a clear understanding of the topic and address both the negative and positive sides of wanting things instantly.
coherence cohesion
You have structured the essay into distinct paragraphs, each addressing different points related to the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • instant gratification
  • advent of technology
  • smartphones
  • internet
  • social media platforms
  • online shopping
  • fast-paced nature
  • modern life
  • immediate satisfaction
  • drive innovation
  • efficiency
  • streamlined
  • user-friendly
  • erosion of patience
  • impulsive buying
  • shallow consumption
  • interpersonal relationships
  • unrealistic standards
What to do next:
Look at other essays: