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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The line graph below shows the number of monthly active users of some social network and messaging services between 2010 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph below shows the number of monthly active users of some social network and messaging services between 2010 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#line #users #network #services #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The diagram gives information on how many
people
Use synonyms
 (in percentage) used multiple social media platforms every month, compared
by
Change preposition
to
show examples
Correct article usage
the numbers
show examples
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
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 of
sites
Use synonyms
 and the
years
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2014 and 2015.
Overall
Linking Words
, over the
two
Use synonyms
years
Use synonyms
, the tendencies are quite identical. Most of the users were engaged with one social networking site, and the user number
decreases
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
while
Linking Words
 the website number
increases
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
. Looking closely at the percentages
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
each year,
people
Use synonyms
 who signed up for just one social media account accounted for the largest proportion in 2014 and 2015, at 36% and 28% respectively. The second and third highest numbers were very similar in both
years
Use synonyms
 which were the percentages of the users who were active on none or
two
Use synonyms
sites
Use synonyms
, between 21% to 24%.
Although
Linking Words
 there is an upward trend that more cyber citizens used more than
two
Use synonyms
sites
Use synonyms
 in 2015 than
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2014, less than 10%
Use synonyms
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
 used four or five
sites
Use synonyms
 over the
two
Use synonyms
years
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. The smallest proportions
composed
Add a missing verb
are composed
show examples
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 who used five
sites
Use synonyms
, to be more precise, 2% in 2014 and 4% in 2015.
Submitted by carriexue23 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, sites, years, two with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • monthly active users
  • social network services
  • messaging services
  • time frame
  • observe a trend
  • fluctuation
  • noticeable increase
  • significant decrease
  • peak
  • trough
  • exponential growth
  • relative decline
  • steady rise
  • dramatic fall
  • comparative analysis
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