The chart gives information about the percentage of overweight men and women in Australia from 1980 to 2010.

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The bar chart below highlights the number of Australian people being overweight, classified by gender during the period between 1980 and 2010. A glance at the bar chart provided reveals that, there were more obese men than women. Their overweight rate exceeded year by year.

While

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females did not have a considerable figure of increasing ratio. But,

instead

Linking Words

a minimal increase only per year. To be more detailed, in 1980, under 50% of men in Australia were fat compared to only 30% of females. After 10 years,

whereas

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a plethora of males climbed slightly to over 50%, females witnessed a remarkable growth to 40%. In

the

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2000, it can be seen that a good deal of

Australian

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the Australian

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population

were

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was

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suffering from obesity. The proportion of the former rose and reached a peak of 70%. Afterwards, it remained stable until 2010.

Likewise

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, the amount of the latter

also

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escalated by 10% in 2000 and maintained the same level for 10 years.

ShaxnozaMon May 20 2024

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

160 words

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The chart gives information about the percentage of overweight men and women in Australia from 1980 to 2010.

Caring for children is important in any society. All parents should be required to take childcare courses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some say that it would be better if the majority of employees worked from home instead of travelling to a workplace every day. Do you think the advantages of working from home outweigh the disadvantages?

Some companies give a higher salary to CEO than the common employees. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some cities ban private cars from entering the centre and force people to use bicycles and buses. Do the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say that the government should spend more money taking care of elderly people while others think that government spending should be spent more on the education of young people. Discuss both views and give your opinion.