It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age.Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children?

the role of

punishment

Use synonyms

in acknowledging right and wrong in youngsters has sparked considerable controversy.

while

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some advocate for its

benficial

Correct your spelling

beneficial

impact, I,

along with

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others believe these punitive practices

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instead

Rephrase

apply

show examples

lead to an impaired mental state

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apply

show examples

instead

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however

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, there are some constructive

preventing

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prevention

show examples

methods parents and tutors can adopt that are

further

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elaborated

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on in

show examples

this

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essay.

to begin

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with, there are several measures parents and teachers implement to achieve

this

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goal. punishments being one of them, is highly common among them and

in particular

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, physical ones. having mere and transient benefits,

such

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measures often result in kids' aggressiveness, resentment, and in some cases, depression as a means of escaping, leaving less mental capability or desire to foster any knowledge or adhere to other's regulations. to illustrate, a study conducted at the University of Arkansas demonstrated a positive correlation between

such

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practices and children's disengagement in classrooms, highlighting the detrimental role of physical

punishment

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nevertheless

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punishment

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is not always about acting physically.

in other words

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, depriving the kids

from

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show examples

their beloved objects or practices,

such

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as their

favorite

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favourite

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toy or watching TV,

while

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being more gentle, prevents them from doing

the

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apply

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wrong and

thus

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promots

Correct your spelling

promotes

promote

them to conduct

Correct pronoun usage

themselves in

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the proper way. take the kid who has bullied his peers as an example. one efficient

punishment

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here is restricting their resting time within classes

that

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which

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would lead to the acknowledgement of what they have done wrong;

therefore

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, the teacher has achieved the goal without hurting

child's

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the child's

show examples

mental health or prompting their disengagement. to put it in a nutshell, despite the

delterious

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deleterious

impact of physical preventive actions, other forms of them can be used as an efficient way to tackle youngsters' wrongdoings and foster the ability

of distinguishing

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to distinguish

show examples

between what is wrong and what is right, without hurting their feelings or causing

further

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problems.

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task achievement

Consider using a clearer thesis statement to articulate your stance on the topic more explicitly in the introduction. This can help frame your argument effectively from the beginning.

coherence cohesion

Work on your transitions between sentences and paragraphs to improve the logical flow of your essay. This will help the reader follow your argument more easily.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea and develop it fully. Avoid introducing multiple different points in a single paragraph as it can confuse the reader.

task achievement

Pay attention to the accuracy of your language, as minor inaccuracies are present. Revising for grammar and vocabulary precision will help convey your arguments more clearly.

task achievement

The essay addresses the question and makes a relevant argument about the use of punishment to teach children right from wrong.

task achievement

The essay includes specific examples to support the main points, such as the study conducted at the University of Arkansas.

coherence cohesion

There is a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a sense of closure to the essay.

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

303 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

punishment
positive reinforcement
consequences
time-outs
removal of privileges
open communication
clear expectations
consistency
fairness
disciplinary action
proportionate
moral values
internalization

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