IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

the chart below shows the percentage of river water in UK rivers that is classified as having good chemical quality between 1990 and 2002.

the chart below shows the percentage of river water in UK rivers that is classified as having good chemical quality between 1990 and 2002.
#percentage #river #water #uk #rivers #quality
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The picture
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consists
consits
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consists
 of the title "River
water
quality
 in the UK" illustrating the percentage of river
water
 with good chemical
quality
 from 1990 to 2002 across four regions:
Northen
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Northern
Ireland
,
England
,
Wales
 and
Scotland
Overall
, there
were
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was
show examples
 a considerable variation in the figure for
England
 and
Scotland
. Meanwhile, the percentage of
Wales
 and Nothern
Ireland
 stayed unchanged most of the period, until the year 1998,
tha
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the
 data for Nothern
Ireland
 reached the peak of the chart. Starting with 45% in the year 1990, the proportion of
water
quality
 in
England
 increased steadily. Until 1996, the figure for
water
quality
 in
England
 reached the peak at approximately 70%, after
that
Add a comma
that,
show examples
 it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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witnessed a significant drop from nearly 70% to exactly 20%. Meanwhile, the percentage of river
water
 in
Scotland
 having good chemical
quality
 was only half as much as the figure for
England
 at about 21%, after which it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
remained unchanged in the next six
years
 (at 30%).
However
, there was
sharp
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a sharp
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 increase from 30% to 50% in 2002, surpassing the data for
England
 .
Moreoever
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However
, another surpassing point
occured
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occurred
occurs
 between the year 2000 and 2002,
while
 the number of good chemical
quality
 rivers in
England
 rose quickly from 20% to 50%, the data for
Scotland
 experienced a rapid fall
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
 20% in the
last
 2
years
.
On the other hand
, the proportion of
water
quality
 in
Wales
 and Northern
Ireland
 reached a plateau of 95% and 85% respectively in the first
eitght
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eight
years
. In the following
years
,
Wales
 witnessed a sudden drop to 80%,
while
Nothern
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Northern
show examples
Ireland
 climbed to 95% in 2000
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and maintanced
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maintanced
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maintenance
maintained
 that value until the end of the period.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, quality, ireland, england, wales, scotland, years with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "drop" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "unchanged" was used 2 times.
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