The graphs below show the percentage of men and women aged 60-64 who were employed in four countries in 1970 and 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevent
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The given line graph illustrates the percentage of
woman
and men who were employed in four different countries in 1970 and 2000. The data is measured in the percentage
Fix the agreement mistake
women
Overall
, it can be seen that man
in all of the countries and Fix the agreement mistake
men
year
were higher than Fix the agreement mistake
years
woman
. Fix the agreement mistake
women
Additionally
, the amount of man
and Fix the agreement mistake
men
woman
in 2000 Fix the agreement mistake
women
higher
than Add a missing verb
is higher
1970
except Change preposition
in 1970
that
in Correct word choice
apply
Belgium
and Japan
Moving to woman
in Fix the agreement mistake
women
Belgium
and Japan
, the aged
60 – 64 Replace the word
ages
was
Verb problem
had
a
insignificantly increased which Change the article
an
has
7% in 1970 and Verb problem
was
increase
to 8% Wrong verb form
increased
by
Change preposition
in
Belgium
and 40% to 43% in Japan
. Besides
, USA and Australia has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
similarly
decreased which 38% to 36% and 18% to 16%
Moving to males, the ratio of Japan
was the highest which has
74% at first and in the end it climbed to 86% becoming the highest in Verb problem
was
this
chart. USA and Australia also
has
a Change the verb form
have
similarly increasing
which Replace the word
similar increase
has
the ratio respectively 55% to 73% and 47% to 76%. Unnecessary verb
apply
Finally
, In Belgium
, the proportion in
the first time Change preposition
for
has
only 19% Verb problem
was
then
it rocketed to 79% in 2000Submitted by [email protected] on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "similarly".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words woman, belgium, japan with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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