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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The bar chart illustrates various means of transport in terms of total mileage covered in the UK from 1990 to 2000.

The bar chart illustrates various means of transport in terms of total mileage covered in the UK from 1990 to 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that there was an upward trend in using buses and trails in both two years.
Additionally
Linking Words
, bus and rail saw an increase in the number of usage
whereas
Linking Words
 bike and motor had an opposite trend. In 1990, around 40
billion
Use synonyms
 kilometres were travelled by bus
users
Use synonyms
, followed by about 35
billion
Use synonyms
 for railway commuters. After ten years, the number of
users
Use synonyms
 of two types of
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
transport rose by 5
billion
Use synonyms
 kilometres with 45
billion
Use synonyms
 kilometres for bus
users
Use synonyms
 and around 38 for railway
users
Use synonyms
. Turning to less commonly-used modes of transport, in 1990, there was the highest distance travelled by motor at 6
billion
Use synonyms
, compared to nearly 3
billion
Use synonyms
 by bike and just under 1
billion
Use synonyms
 by air. Over the following decade, motorbikes and bikes witnessed a decline in levels of usage, with respective figures dropping by around 1
billion
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 and 2
billion
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the figure for air travel increased significantly by approximately 3
billion
Use synonyms
.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words billion, users with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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