“Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has a negative effect on their social lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?”

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It is argued that social platforms decrease the time of
socialize
Change the verb form
socializing
show examples
between individuals.I agree that it has a negative effect because social
life
protect
Correct subject-verb agreement
protects
show examples
people
from health issues, and
stronge
Correct your spelling
strong
stronger
social
skills
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
a lot of benefits for a member. There is a direct
linkes
Correct your spelling
link
links
between health problems and social
life
,
this
is to say that isolated
people
who
unable
Add a missing verb
are unable
show examples
to relate to any social groups are more exposed to
feel
Wrong verb form
feeling
show examples
lonely all the time, and
lonliness
Correct your spelling
loneliness
plays an important factor in increasing mental issues.
Such
as,
deprission
Correct your spelling
depression
,
anxitey
Correct your spelling
anxiety
.
As well
Rephrase
Also
show examples
, a recent study shows that social media is the main reason that
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
to keep
soceity
Correct your spelling
society
members
live
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
in isolation manner.
In other words
, men and women should enjoy
a huge social bonds
Correct the article-noun agreement
a huge social bond
huge social bonds
show examples
in order to become
healther
Correct your spelling
healthier
. High communication
skills
plays
Change the verb form
play
show examples
a significant ways in developing
ones
Change to a genitive case
one's
show examples
life
,
this
is mean
Wrong verb form
means
show examples
that
people
who
able
Add a missing verb
are able
show examples
to communicate well
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
emotinal intellegence
Correct your spelling
emotional intelligence
which
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
them build a real connection with
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
and
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
them a trusted relationships.As well, good social
skills
manifest in career lives, a worker who
being
Change the form of the verb
is
show examples
engaged and connected with other
collegues
Correct your spelling
colleagues
has more
tendecy
Correct your spelling
tendency
to get
recomondation
Correct your spelling
recommendation
recommendations
from them.
This
is to say, obtaining a promotion is more
easliy
Correct your spelling
easily
for
people
with
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
higher social
skills
.
To sum up
, I believe that social applications
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
a number of
disadavntages
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
. It
touchs
Correct your spelling
touches
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
wellness and that brings a huge
lose
Replace the word
loss
show examples
in
ones
Change to a genitive case
one's
show examples
life
.As well,
and
Correct word choice
as
show examples
lower
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
social abilities in
negative
Change the article
a negative
show examples
way.
Submitted by noufxmut on

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coherence cohesion
1. Enhance the coherence and cohesion by adding clearer transitions between ideas to improve the flow of information. For example, using transitional phrases such as 'furthermore,' 'in addition,' or 'on the other hand' can clarify the relationship between different points.
task achievement
2. Develop ideas more comprehensively by providing relevant and specific examples. For instance, instead of just stating 'a recent study shows,' mention the study's name, the organization that conducted it, and its key findings to give more context and credibility.
task achievement
1. Good attempt at discussing relevant points and elements related to the impact of modern communication on social lives.
coherence cohesion
2. The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps organize the response effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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