The bar chart shows the percentage of school children learning to play different musical instruments in 2005, 2010, 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Contained in the chart is information pertaining to the percentage of three different kinds of musical instruments played by students from 2005 to 2015.

Overall

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, it can be seen that more instruments were played by students with the exception of the Violin throughout the period.

Additionally

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, Guitar became the most popular musical tool

at the end

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of the period. Beginning with Piano, the proportion of school children who played

this

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was more than 10% in 2005,

then

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it saw a gradual increase to nearly 20% in 2010 and ended up at approximately 37% in 2015. With respect to Guitar, about 10% of pupils played

this

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at the beginning before witnessing a remarkable increase to exactly 40% in 2015 Turning to the remaining instruments, Drums stood at around 5% in 2005 and remained the same until 2010 before rising to 9%

at the end

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of the timeframe.

By contrast

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, nearly 10% of pupils used Violin in 2005.

This

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was followed by a slight decrease to about 9% in 2010 and merely 5% in 2015.

Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on Tue Jun 11 2024

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

173 words

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The bar chart shows the percentage of school children learning to play different musical instruments in 2005, 2010, 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

In many countries, the number of animals and plant declining? Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved

. In some cities, people prefer riding bicycles rather than drive cars. In some cities, people choose to drive cars rather than ride bicycles. What are the reasons for their preferences? Which one do you think is better development?

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think it is an approriate use of government money?

In many large cities, people have to spend hours driving in heavy traffic every day. What are the effects of this on society and the individual? What can be done about it? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Accommodation and transport problems are increasing in many large cities. Therefore, businesses are encouraged to move to rural areas. Do advantages outweigh disadvantages?