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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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This
Linking Words
 figure illustrates the top ten nations creating and using electricity in 2014.
Overall
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, China and the USA are the first and the second countries producing and consuming
this
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 energy,
While
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 Korea is the lowest country among these nations. The
production
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 in all countries is more than their
consumption
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 except Germany. It can be seen that China with 5,398
billion
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kWh
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 in
production
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 and 5,322
billion
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kWh
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 in
consumption
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 has the highest rank in the table. The second rank is the USA with 4,099
billion
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kWh
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production
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 and 3,866
billion
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kWh
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consumption
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. Germany with 582.5
billion
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kWh
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 in
consumption
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 is more than 526.6
billion
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kWh
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 in
production
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. On the flip side, Korea is placed in 10th rank with 485.1
billion
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kWh
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production
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 and 449.5
billion
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kWh
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consumption
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. By looking more into details, the gap between the value of the
production
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 and the
consumption
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 in Russia is so small with 1,057 and 1,038 respectively.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words production, consumption, billion, kwh with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • electricity production
  • electricity consumption
  • disparity
  • significant
  • top ten countries
  • main features
  • compare
  • relevant
  • geographical concentration
  • trends
  • patterns
  • implications
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