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Writing Samples
Band 7

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purpose in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purpose in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The pie chart illustrates the
water
Use synonyms
percentage
Use synonyms
 usage for various motives in six different places.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, Africa, Central
Asia
Use synonyms
, Southeast
Asia
Use synonyms
 and South America have a majority
percentage
Use synonyms
 in using
water
Use synonyms
 for agriculture
use
Use synonyms
 for 84%, 88%, 81%, and 71% respectively.
Moreover
Linking Words
, Central
Asia
Use synonyms
 and Southeast
Asia
Use synonyms
 have both 7% in domestic
use
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 Africa uses a slightly higher
percentage
Use synonyms
 of 9%.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Central
Asia
Use synonyms
 has the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
water
Use synonyms
 usage
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
 only 5% in Industrial
use
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, North America and Europe used the majority of their
water
Use synonyms
 in industrial
use
Use synonyms
 for 48% and 53%. In fact, Europe has the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 industrial
use
Use synonyms
 out of the six areas.
In addition
Linking Words
, only 39% and 32% of
water
Use synonyms
 are used in North America and Europe for agricultural
use
Use synonyms
.
To conclude
Linking Words
, agricultural and industrial
use
Use synonyms
 varies in different places.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, domestic
use
Use synonyms
 has the smallest
percentage
Use synonyms
 in all six areas.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, percentage, asia, use with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 6 times.
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