In many countries, smoking is now illegal in public places. Many people believe that such a ban is justified.
in recent years, many countries banned
smokers
from smoking in public places
. Smoking in restaurants, parks and in front the children
without their care has a great impact on prevalence of the lung disease and cancer. from my perspective, I fully agree with banning smoking in public places
.
Firstly
, smoking has serious consequences for smokers
themselves, their family and their friends. Passive means inhalation of tobacco smoking which is one of the most dangerous exposures to non-smokers
. For instance
, Ireland was one of those countries which prevent using of smoking in public places
, they record declining in the prevalence of related diseases.
Secondly
, these restrictions assist smokers
and addicted people to drop out of smoking whereas
the prohibition in public areas could help smokers
to stay a long time without smoke because there are penalties and fines. However
, the insertion of these limitations decreases the exposure of children
and ill people who have asthma to the polluted air. furthermore
, maintaining of healthy environment, and improving residents’ awareness of the seriousness of this
sequel should come from government laws. For example
, some children
who have breathing problems have a history of exposure.
In conclusion, I advocate banning smoking in public places
because it can improve the community's health and instill the idea in children
about the effects and disadvantageous of smoking. Statute rules in the country can provide enhanced community awareness.Submitted by rraghad.b on
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task achievement
Work on sentence structures to avoid minor grammatical errors and enhance clarity. For example, the sentence 'Smoking in restaurants, parks and in front the children without their care has a great impact' could be rephrased for better clarity.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to better support the arguments made. Although there is a good example from Ireland, including more examples from different contexts would help strengthen the essay.
coherence cohesion
Ensure smooth transitions between ideas and paragraphs to improve coherence. For instance, use linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your arguments more seamlessly.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to minor punctuation and grammatical errors to enhance the clarity and professional quality of the essay. A thorough proofreading could help catch these errors.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, which provide a strong framework for the argument.
task achievement
The main points are well supported, especially with the example from Ireland demonstrating the positive effects of smoking bans.
Your opinion
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