The pie charts compare the amount of online shopping sales for retail parts in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Moreover, those are divided into four categories: travel, film/music, book, and clothes.

The pie charts compare the amount of online shopping sales for retail parts in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Moreover, those are divided into four categories: travel, film/music, book, and clothes.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The pie charts compare the amount of online shopping sales for retail parts in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Moreover, those are divided into four categories: travel, film/music, book, and clothes.
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The given pie charts compare the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
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of online shopping
sales
Use synonyms
for retail parts in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013,
Morover
Correct your spelling
Moreover
, those are divided into four main categories: travel, film/music, books and clothes,
It is clear that
Linking Words
the
sales
Use synonyms
from travel had the highest percentage in 2003.
According to
Linking Words
the diagram, the
retail's
Change noun form
retail
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revenue on travel
have
Change the verb form
has
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seen a decrease of 7% in 2013, which makes it the second most profitable category in 2013,
However
Linking Words
, the music/film sector had a significant increase in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
profits from 2003 to 2013 with a 12% increase.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the clothing sector had a
one third
Add a hyphen
one-third
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decrease
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
sales
Use synonyms
between 2003 and 2013,
Nonetheless
Linking Words
, the book sector's revenue had grown at a low rate of 3%.
To conclude
Linking Words
, two of the four categories improved its profits,
whereas
Linking Words
the other two had a drop in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sales
Use synonyms
.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sales with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "amount" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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