The pie charts compare the amount of online shopping sales for retail parts in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Moreover, those are divided into four categories: travel, film/music, book, and clothes.
The given pie charts compare the
amount
of online shopping Change the quantifier
number
sales
for retail parts in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013,Morover
, those are divided into four main categories: travel, film/music, books and clothes, Correct your spelling
Moreover
It is clear that
the sales
from travel had the highest percentage in 2003.
According to
the diagram, the retail's
revenue on travel Change noun form
retail
have
seen a decrease of 7% in 2013, which makes it the second most profitable category in 2013, Change the verb form
has
However
, the music/film sector had a significant increase in the
profits from 2003 to 2013 with a 12% increase.
Correct article usage
apply
Secondly
, the clothing sector had a one third
decrease Add a hyphen
one-third
on
Change preposition
in
sales
between 2003 and 2013,Nonetheless
, the book sector's revenue had grown at a low rate of 3%.
To conclude
, two of the four categories improved its profits, whereas
the other two had a drop in the
Correct article usage
apply
sales
.Submitted by yazanalt523 on
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sales with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "amount" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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