The pie charts show the average consumption of food in the world in 2008 compared to two countries; China and India

The pie charts show the average consumption of food in the world in 2008 compared to two countries; China and India
A glance at the data illustrates the
share
of different
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
of
world
food
consumption
, namely,
China
and
India
.
Overall
, the most striking is each
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
country demonstrated favorite
food
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
to each other. The most striking
consumption
on
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apply
show examples
worldwide is dominated by Processed
food
for almost half of
shares
Add an article
the shares
show examples
around 41%.
This
condition
also
reflected in
China
and
India
, which is shows the dominant value of
share
. The next variant is
vegetable
Fix the agreement mistake
vegetables
show examples
and fruits
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
already spend around 29%. It is
also
mirrored in
China
and
India
Change noun form
India's
show examples
consumption
of Vegetables and fruits. The attention is
also
spotted on nuts and seeds
consumption
, even though the aggregate of
world
consumption
only
Add a missing verb
is only
show examples
4%, the condition
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
seem different from
China
and
India
, meanwhile the
utilize
Replace the word
utilisation
show examples
of
nut
Fix the agreement mistake
nuts
show examples
and seeds
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
appears in high portion rather than the aggregate, since the data on
China
19%, and
India
11%. All of
this condition
Fix the agreement mistake
these conditions
show examples
already exceed the shares of
world
consumption
on it.
Overall
,
share
Correct article usage
the share
show examples
percentage of utilization the Processed
food
in
China
and
India
around
Add a missing verb
is around
show examples
one-third among
others kind
Fix the agreement mistake
other kinds
show examples
of
food
, and it
reflected
Add a missing verb
is reflected
show examples
by the
world
share
consumption
percentage.
Submitted by dwima.rizky on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, overall".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words share, world, food, consumption, china, india with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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