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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #percentages #meals #three #nutrients #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given charts show the average percentages in distinctive meals of 3 kinds of nutrients which can not be good for people's health if eaten excessively.
Overall
Linking Words
, both
sodium
Use synonyms
 and saturated fat are consumed the most in the dinner.
Besides
Linking Words
, the meal which has added
sugar
Use synonyms
 the most is the snacks. In breakfast, all the 3nutrients are not too much and they do not have big differences, which are 14, 16, and 16 per
cent
Use synonyms
 of
sodium
Use synonyms
, saturated fat and added
sugar
Use synonyms
 respectively.
In addition
Linking Words
, in the lunch, they make up quite high percentages, which are 29, 26, and 19 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, dinner is the meal which contains the most amount of unhealthy nutrients: 43 per
cent
Use synonyms
sodium
Use synonyms
, 37 per
cent
Use synonyms
 saturated fat and 23 per
cent
Use synonyms
 added
sugar
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, in the snacks, it started having big differences. It contains 14 and 21 per
cent
Use synonyms
sodium
Use synonyms
 and saturated fat and the added
sugar
Use synonyms
 is twice as much saturated fat, which stays at 42 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sodium, sugar, cent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentages" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "differences" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrients
  • unhealthy
  • typical meals
  • percentages
  • saturated fats
  • fibers
  • sugars
  • impact
  • average
  • consumption
  • trends
  • breakfast
  • lunch
  • dinner
  • highest
  • lowest
  • variation
  • implications
  • balanced diet
  • recommendations
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