The diagram below shows the average hours of unpaid work per week done by people in different categories. Describe the information presented below. Comparing results for men and women in the categories shown. Suggest reasons for what you see.

The diagram below shows the average hours of unpaid work per week done by people in different categories. Describe the information presented below. Comparing results for men and women in the categories shown. Suggest reasons for what you see.
The bar graph illustrates the comparison of unpaid
work
hours
per week on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
average which are done by
men
and females in various
categories
. The most significant
facts
Fix the agreement mistake
fact
show examples
to emerge from
this
graph
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
the
number
of
children
significantly influences
women
Change noun form
women's
show examples
work
hours
in a week
while
the unpaid
work
hours
for
men
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
determined by
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of
children
. Looking at the details, the
number
of married
women
and married
men
without
children
have slight differences where the group of married females
work
around 30
hours
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a week
while
married
men
in
this
categories
Fix the agreement mistake
category
show examples
work
about 19
hours
.
On the other hand
, the
categories
of
women
who have one and have more than three
children
share almost a similar
number
where the
number
of weekly
hours
they spend
reach
Change the verb form
reaches
show examples
around 52 and 55
hours
respectively. Meanwhile, the group of married
men
who have one and three
childs
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
work
just under 20
hours
which is two times lower than married
women
in the same
categories
.
Submitted by k a l l a on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words work, hours, men, categories, number, children, women with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!