Nowadays,children watch a lot of TV and play video games.However,some think that these activities are not beneficial for a child's mental health. In what extent do you agree or disagree?
These days,children tend to spend their major time,watching the
TV
besides
playing video games
.Although
mankind,incorporating experts do
not contradict Correct subject-verb agreement
does
with
the aspect of 'the Change preposition
apply
TV
and video games
should be restricted as it is detrimential
Correct your spelling
detrimental
for
a Change preposition
to
child
's mental health',I believe these technological activities must be pursued as it has more dominant pros than living without it
.
The extent of exacerbating a Correct pronoun usage
them
child
's mental health is only valid if a child
becomes addicted to technological devices.In other cases,whenever the child
does not feel obliged to play video games
continuously,watching the TV
and such
activities can aid children in many ways.
To begin
with,most of the kids comprehend languages by watching the TV
or playing computer games
.According to
a
research that has been carried out recently,it was implied that the proportion of children who can speak a foreign language,even with a tremendous range of vocabulary,was depicted on a large scale.
Correct article usage
apply
Moreover
,many scientists claim that this
might act to
incline the intelligence Verb problem
apply
as well as
the cognitive ability as the child
who plays computer games
would press the buttons on keyboard
Correct article usage
the keyboard
while
looking at the screen.This
would eventually escalate the multi-task capability of the individual.Furthermore
,depending on what type of game the kid plays,he may learn new information which will contribute the their intellectual skills.
In conclusion,I ought to consider that inspite
of the noxious influences on the kid's physical and mental health when Correct your spelling
in spite
excessive
amount of time is spent on technological activities,it can lead to better knowledge of languages and a more developed mind.Add an article
an excessive
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that sentences are well-structured and punctuated correctly. Pay attention to spaces after commas and full stops.
task achievement
Expand on some of the points with more specific examples to illustrate your arguments clearly.
coherence cohesion
Work on making your introduction more engaging and succinct. Aim to precisely state your stance and the main points you will discuss.
task achievement
You provided a clear stance on the topic, expressing your belief that the benefits of TV and video games outweigh the negatives.
coherence cohesion
You included a conclusion that succinctly summarizes your main points, which helps to reinforce your argument.
task achievement
You referred to research and scientific claims to support your arguments, which adds credibility to your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.