IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-tim e work did after leaving college in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show what UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-tim e work did after leaving college in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #uk #graduate #students #full-tim #e #work #college #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The chart illustrates the destinations of graduate and postgraduate
students
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 in the year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2008 who did not go into
full-time
Add an article
a full-time
show examples
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
 after leaving college.
Overall
Linking Words
, there are 4 categories including part-time
work
Use synonyms
, voluntary
work
Use synonyms
,
further
Linking Words
 study and unemployment.
Basically
Add a comma
Basically,
show examples
 there are more graduates than postgraduates in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 and have
similar
Correct article usage
a similar
show examples
 distribution on both charts.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
highest
Add an article
the highest
show examples
 number of graduates prefer to
further
Linking Words
 studies compared to those who want to do
part time
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
 job with differences of about 1500 graduates, 29665 and 17735 respectively.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
5
Correct article usage
a 5
show examples
times
highers
Correct your spelling
higher
show examples
 number of
students
Use synonyms
prefers
Change the verb form
prefer
show examples
 to be unemployed than doing any voluntary
work
Use synonyms
 with 16235 and 3500 respectively. On the other
hands
Fix the agreement mistake
hand
show examples
, postgraduates who
wants
Change the verb form
want
show examples
 to
further
Linking Words
 study and
working
Wrong verb form
work
show examples
part time
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
 are almost equal with 2725 and 2535 respectively with only 190
students
Use synonyms
 differences.
Besides
Linking Words
, only 345 postgraduates participated in voluntary
work
Use synonyms
 and 1625
students
Use synonyms
prefers
Wrong verb form
preferred
show examples
 to stay unemployed.
Submitted by coke_sars on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "further".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words students, work with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "differences" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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