Some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are most enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interest than their jobs. Discuss both of the attitudes and give your opinion,
It is true that
,
Remove the comma
apply
human's
Change noun form
human
lives
is a Use synonyms
mistery
Correct your spelling
mystery
Use synonyms
lives
, Change the noun form
life
people
are Use synonyms
confusing
Replace the word
confused
to choose
which is the most Change preposition
about choosing
importance
. Some Replace the word
important
people
believe that Use synonyms
work
is the most significant thing in mankind's Use synonyms
live
Replace the word
life
while
others say that Linking Words
hobbies
Use synonyms
,
and past time Remove the comma
apply
activities
should be ranked Use synonyms
first
than their Use synonyms
Use synonyms
works
. Fix the agreement mistake
work
This
essay will discuss both viewpoints and I strongly agree with the latter opinion for the following reasons.
On the one hand, Linking Words
human's
Change noun form
human
lives
are very short period, so they should do whatever they like, and Use synonyms
make
Verb problem
be
happiness
Replace the word
happy
them
. Correct pronoun usage
apply
That is
, Linking Words
past time
Correct your spelling
pastime
activities
Use synonyms
along with
Linking Words
hobbies
can help to produce the happy hormone Use synonyms
coupled with
dopamine in our bodies, and Linking Words
as a result
, depression and anxiety will be reduced by Linking Words
this
. Linking Words
For example
, Linking Words
according to
statistics, Linking Words
people
who give more prioritise to their Use synonyms
interest
, and Fix the agreement mistake
interests
hobbies
Use synonyms
they
stay Correct pronoun usage
apply
for
away from Change preposition
apply
phychological
disorders. Correct your spelling
psychological
Hence
, humankind. should have all rights to do whatever they have more interest rather than Linking Words
work
.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, Linking Words
Use synonyms
works
always Correct subject-verb agreement
work
bring
the Verb problem
takes
first
place in Use synonyms
people
's Use synonyms
lives
rather than Use synonyms
hobbies
, and anything else. Use synonyms
This
is, Linking Words
some
employees have more passion Correct word choice
because some
to
their jobs, so they like to Change preposition
for
work
hard, and get Use synonyms
reward
from their employers Fix the agreement mistake
rewards
such
as incentives, promotions and recognisations. Linking Words
For instance
, businessmen have more passion towards their business, and they always give more Linking Words
piroritise
on Correct your spelling
prioritise
Use synonyms
works
rather than anything, even family Fix the agreement mistake
work
relationship
and Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
hobbies
, that's why they could succeed Use synonyms
their
Change preposition
in their
career
. Needless to say, if wants to Fix the agreement mistake
careers
carrer
success, Correct your spelling
career
work
should be ranked Use synonyms
first
other than always brings secondary.
In conclusion, Use synonyms
work
is to be considered as Use synonyms
most
crucial Correct article usage
the most
things
in Fix the agreement mistake
thing
people
's Use synonyms
lives
because many want to Use synonyms
success
Replace the word
succeed
their
Change preposition
in their
carrer
, and they have more passion Correct your spelling
career
to
their Jobs, Change preposition
for
although
, Linking Words
hobbies
Use synonyms
,
and leisure Remove the comma
apply
activities
should be ranked Use synonyms
first
because it increases Use synonyms
the
happy hormone Correct article usage
apply
along with
dopamine, that leads to Linking Words
stay
far Change the verb form
staying
maway
from stress and depression. Correct your spelling
away
However
, in my opinion, Linking Words
hobbies
and pastime Use synonyms
activities
are the most significant aspect Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
of
people
's Use synonyms
lives
than Use synonyms
Use synonyms
works
.Fix the agreement mistake
work
Submitted by reanudeepan on
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formulation advice
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paragraph advice
Ensure that each paragraph discusses only one main idea. This will help in creating a logical and clear progression of your argument. Avoid introducing new ideas in your conclusion.
grammar advice
Aim to reduce grammatical errors, as they can potentially confuse the reader and interrupt the flow of your essay. Pay special attention to subject-verb agreement and correct use of articles.
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