Mrs Barrette, an English-speaking woman who lives in your town, has advertised for someone to help her in her home for a few hours a day next summer. Write a letter to Mrs Barrett. In your letter •Suggest how you could help her in her home •say why you would like to do this work •explain when you will and will not be available Write at least 150 words

#mrs #barrette #woman #lives #town #someone #home #hours #summer #barrett #•suggest #•say #work #•explain

Dear Mrs Barrette, I am Lovely Sing, I saw your advertisement in today's newspaper that you are looking for someone to help you

Change preposition

show examples

home for a few hours a day next summer. I am writing

this

letter to show my interest in helping you

Change preposition

with

show examples

this

work. I am working in IT company from 2 to 10. That's why I have a lot of spare time in the morning time and can help you every day for 3 to 4 hours. As I am local here. 'If you want to find a new home' in that case

also

I can help you. Even from arranging the cleaning till

furniturs

Correct your spelling

furniture

, I will be there. I know all the local shops to buy daily groceries at the correct price. I

also

I can

help

Rephrase

also help

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you with introducing the culture of

this

city with

their

Correct pronoun usage

its

show examples

festivals. I can help you to manage to

joining

Change the verb form

join

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local clubs to make new friends. I can help you with everything

want

Verb problem

apply

show examples

you want. Just let me know in which month you are going to travel and

according to

that

Add a comma

that,

show examples

I will make the necessary arrangements for you. Thank you in advance. Regards, Lovely Sing.

Submitted by akankshayhedaoo10 on Mon Jul 15 2024

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task achievement

Make sure to review your letter for grammatical errors and awkward phrasing to improve clarity and readability.

coherence cohesion

Try to organize your ideas into clear paragraphs, with each paragraph discussing a single main idea.

coherence cohesion

Use more transitional phrases to improve the flow between your points and make the letter easier to follow.

task achievement

You provided specific examples of how you can help, which strengthens your application.

coherence cohesion

The greeting and closing were appropriate and polite.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

198 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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