IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Last month you had a holiday overseas where you stayed with some friends. They have just sent you some photos of your holiday. Write a letter to your friends. In your letter • thank them for the photos and for the holiday explain why you didn't write earlier • invite them to come and stay with you

#month #holiday #friends #photos
Dears friends, are you?
,
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apply
show examples
i
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I
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 hope you are fine. I'm writing
this
 letter about the
photos
 of our
holiday
.
Firstly
,
i
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I
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 want to thank you
about
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for
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 the
photos
 of our
holiday
. It is
amazing
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an amazing
the amazing
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holiday
 with my friends. The
photos
 are truly lovely at my
favorite
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favourite
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 places in your country.
Secondly
, I didn't write
this
 letter earlier before to send these
photos
 for some
reasons
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reason
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. The first reason was about my course.
In
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On
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 my return to my country,
i
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I
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 passed an important exam
in
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at
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 my university and
i
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I
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tooked
Correct your spelling
took
looked
 many days to prepare
of
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for
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this
 exam. The second reason is about my house. I changed my home and I'm much bused with
this
 affair. I changed for a new house, not far to my university. It is
amazing
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an amazing
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 apartment.
Finally
,
i
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I
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 hope you are not angry
to
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with
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 me. On
other
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the other
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 hand,
i
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I
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 want to invite you to come to my new
appartment
Correct your spelling
apartment
 and stay with me
at
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for
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 the next
holiday
. We will pass wonderful days and took a new
photos
. I hope you accept my invitation and I'm
waiting
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waiting for
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 your response. Bests
regards
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regard
show examples
 Rabeb
Submitted by rabebhamdi on

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task achievement
Try to avoid repetition and aim for a more varied vocabulary. This will make your letter more engaging.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that you capitalize the first letter of names, places, and the beginning of sentences consistently. This will make your writing more professional.
coherence cohesion
Review your sentences for small grammatical errors and proper tense usage. For instance, use 'took' instead of 'tooked'.
task achievement
Your letter covers all parts of the task: thanking them, explaining why you didn't write earlier, and extending an invitation.
task achievement
You maintained a friendly and inviting tone throughout the letter, which is very suitable considering the context.
coherence cohesion
You included a clear greeting and closing, which adds a personal touch to the letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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