The natural Sesources such and fresh water as oil, forests. are being consumed. at an alarming rate. What problems does it cause? How can we solve these problems.

It is certainly true that natural resources
such
as
fresh
Correct your spelling
freshwater
show examples
water
, oil and
forests
are being used
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
an extremely fast and unethical way.
Due to
this
, many issues and the solutions to these issues have been implemented, which I will be discussing below.
Firstly
, resources like fresh
water
are at a very low rate around the world. Out of the 78% of the river bodies around the world, only 1.12% is fresh
water
.
Due to
the high consumption, it is decreasing at a very concerning rate.
Moreover
,
freshwaterwater
Correct your spelling
freshwater water
itself cannot be replenished, meaning once it is gone it cannot be regained.
Consequently
, the
water
we drink is being produced chemically which is not good for our well-being.
Secondly
,
forests
are being absolutely massacred and destroyed
due to
the amount of construction taking place to build buildings, roads and dams.
As a result
, the percentage of oxygen in the atmosphere is going down.
This
leads to severe climate changes like earthquakes and acid rain.
Furthermore
, wildlife and tribal people are being displaced.
However
, all of
this
can be taken care of and solved if only the government looks into the situation and takes some important steps.
Firstly
, they will have to build campaigns and institutions that look into and observe carefully the abuse of fresh
water
,
forests
etcetera.
Furthermore
, they should monitor private industries and companies closely, as they illegally chop down
forests
and overuse the freshwater.
Moreover
, the government can invest in renewable energy in order to avoid deforestation. In conclusion, sustainable practices and renewable energy investments are crucial to mitigate resource depletion and ensure a balanced ecosystem for future generations.
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coherence cohesion
Work on the logical structure of your essay. The transitions between some ideas could be smoother and more natural.
task achievement
Try to incorporate more specific and detailed examples to support your points. This will make your argument stronger and more convincing.
task achievement
Be mindful of grammatical errors and awkward phrasing: e.g., 'freshwaterwater' should be 'freshwater,' and ‘78% of the river bodies’ should be ‘78% of the Earth's surface is covered by water' and specify correct fresh water percentage.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion effectively set up and wrap up the discussion, which helps in understanding the main points of the essay.
task achievement
The essay addresses the main issues and offers relevant solutions, presenting a balanced view.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Depletion
  • Scarcity
  • Sanitation
  • Rainwater harvesting
  • Efficient irrigation systems
  • Overconsumption
  • Environmental pollution
  • Climate change
  • Renewable energy
  • Wind power
  • Solar power
  • Hydro power
  • Deforestation
  • Biodiversity
  • Ecosystems
  • Regulations
  • Logging
  • Reforestation
  • Finite resources
  • Economic instability
  • Conflicts
  • Sustainable consumption
  • International cooperation
  • Resource management
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