Nowadays many people have access to computers and a large number of children enjoy playing video games. What are the advantages and disadvantages of playing video games for children? (Band 8,5)
These days,It is becoming more and more popular for people to have
computers
in their house.Moreover
,there is no doubt that children
are so keen on palying
with Correct your spelling
playing
video
games
.Clearly,there are a considerable number of advantages and disadvantages for
having Change preposition
to
computers
and palying
Correct your spelling
playing
games
with them for children
.In this
essay,I will address some benefits and drawbacks of using computer games
for kids.
Let's begin by looking at some merits of playing video
games
for youngsters.As a matter of fact
playing Add a comma
fact,
video
games
causes children
learn
how to compete with their friends in a match.Add the particle
to learn
That is
to say,not only can kids be encouraged to compete or win in a competition,but also
they can be effected to acheive
more success in other parts of life Correct your spelling
achieve
such
as major,job and so on.Another striking pro is that playing with
computer Change preposition
apply
games
can be extremely amusing for them.It is true that some children
decide to take up a course after school in the summer.Take sport
classes as an example.Change the noun form
sports
However
,they may need to be entertained with some digital games
in
Change preposition
on
computers
.
Turning to the other side of the argument,playing video
games
has a lot of various demerits.For instance
,some games
might be so addictive for children
and they are probably interested in enjoying from
these Change preposition
apply
games
for long hours per day.It is considered that a significant number of youngsters prefer to play with their computers
or even their mobile phones rather than going outside or spending time
with their family.Another notable disadvantage is that they may have less time
to do other activities like visiting their friends or doing their homework.Generally speaking,more and more children
are being overwhelmed by playing games
and they do no
recognize their Correct your spelling
not
time
to do other plans.
To conclude
,despite the fact that computers
and video
games
might be practical for feeling completion and amusement,It
Correct pronoun usage
They
also
can be addictive and time consuming
.Add a hyphen
time-consuming
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task achievement
To enhance your task response, make sure your examples are more detailed and specific. Right now, while the essay covers both advantages and disadvantages well, some examples could be more elaborative to add more depth to your points.
coherence cohesion
Improve coherence by eliminating minor inconsistencies in the use of articles and conjunctions. Make sure to maintain consistent spacing and avoid attaching words improperly (e.g., 'palying' instead of 'playing'). These small issues can carry an impact on the overall cohesion.
task achievement
The essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of playing video games for children, showing a balanced view.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion clearly frame the discussion, providing a solid structure to the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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