The diagrams below show the process of making chocolate. Some university students live with their families while studying, but others prefer to move away from home. Do the benefits of moving out attend university outweigh the disadvantages?

#diagrams #show #process #chocolate #university #students #families #move #home

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Nowadays, some college students choose to live separately from their families during their

study

Fix the agreement mistake

studies

show examples

. Despite

Change preposition

apply

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all of the disadvantages, it seems to me that the advantages outweigh the

diadvantages

Correct your spelling

disadvantages

. There are some advantages when college students live independently. , living alone makes them

Unnecessary verb

apply

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more independent. It

teachs

Correct your spelling

teaches

them how to take care of themselves without

depend

Change the form of the verb

depending

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on others.

For instance

Linking Words

, they have to know how to keep their residence clean, how to pay the electricity bill, and

another

Correct quantifier usage

other

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household things that they might not do

while

Linking Words

living with their family.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, living alone sometimes

build

Correct subject-verb agreement

builds

show examples

Correct article usage

a more

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conducive and more comfortable environment to study. There

Change the verb form

are

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some cases when a student

live

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lives

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with a large

family

Correct quantifier usage

number of family

show examples

members or siblings

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show examples

young

ages

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age

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. The condition makes their home quite noisy and

disturb

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disturbs

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them to study.

However

Linking Words

, living outside

families

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families'

family's

show examples

residence

also

Linking Words

bring

Correct subject-verb agreement

brings

show examples

disadvantage

Fix the agreement mistake

disadvantages

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. The biggest disadvantage is the expenses they should

spent

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spend

show examples

. Most of

Add an article

the residence

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residence

Replace the word

residents

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, especially in big

city

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cities

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and strategic

area

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areas

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usually

Add a missing verb

are usually

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quite expensive.

Moreover

Linking Words

, they

also

Linking Words

have to prepare some money for their living expenses,

such

Linking Words

as to buy food, pay electricity

bill

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bills

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, or other household expenses. Still, it will not become a big problem if they know how to manage their allowance properly. From

this

Linking Words

, I believe that living independently

bring

Correct subject-verb agreement

brings

show examples

more advantages for

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

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college

Change preposition

in college

show examples

Remove the comma

apply

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because it will

build

Verb problem

help

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them to become more mature

individual

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individuals

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who can live independently.

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Mon Jul 22 2024

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Basic structure: Change the first paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Only 0 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the first paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
31
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

236 words

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The diagrams below show the process of making chocolate. Some university students live with their families while studying, but others prefer to move away from home. Do the benefits of moving out attend university outweigh the disadvantages?

A lot of money is spent nowadays searching for oil. As the world's oil resources will eventually run out, it would be more logical to spend some of this money on developing new sources of power, such as wind and solar. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Instead of revealing the truth, the mass media very often misguides people. What are the reasons behind this and the visible effects on the society at large?

Nowadays, not enough students choose science subjects in university in many countries. What are the reasons for this problem? What are the effects on society?

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

The best way to make roads safer is to make vehicle drivers take a driving test each year.