The plans below show the layout of a university’s sports centre now, and how it will look after redevelopment. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The map above represents the layout of a university
sports
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
currently and its future plans.
Overall
, there will be many changes, but most of the current
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
will be kept. Currently, the
sports
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
has a
25 meter
Add a hyphen
25-meter
show examples
pool
in the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
, with the gym, seating and changing room situated around it. The reception desk is directly underneath it, with
two
passageways on
two
sides for people to come in and out. There are
also
two
outdoor courts, on the left and right of the main building. In the future, the
sports
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
will
have been
Wrong verb form
be
show examples
renovated extensively.
To begin
with, the
two
outdoor courts have been removed to enlarge the
center
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centre
show examples
.
Although
the facilities have changed drastically, the old reception, the first changing room and the
25 meter
Add a hyphen
25-meter
show examples
pool
as well as
seating
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
stayed pretty much the same. The gym almost doubled in size, being right next to the dance studio in the East. There are
two
dance studios, with both being in the top right corner of the
sports
center
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centre
show examples
. There is a second changing room on the southeast corner, with there being a cafe not far from it.
Lastly
, there is now a leisure
pool
on the left of the
center
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centre
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and is marginally bigger than the 25m
pool
.
Submitted by minhlieu.hnd on

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coherence cohesion
To enhance your essay, provide a clearer and more structured introduction and conclusion. Summarize the main changes and offer a brief comparison upfront. This will improve the logical flow and make your essay more cohesive.
coherence cohesion
When describing the current and future layouts, avoid unnecessary repetition. Focus on key changes and organize information in a way that highlights the transformation clearly.
task achievement
Ensure that all modifications are covered comprehensively. Provide relevant specific examples to illustrate the changes more effectively. For example, mention new facilities in a context that makes their importance or utility clear.
task achievement
Maintain consistency in verb tenses when describing the current and future states. Ensure the use of passive voice is appropriate to describe changes made in the redevelopment.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear comparison between the current and future layouts of the sports center, making it easy to understand the changes.
coherence cohesion
Descriptions of specific features, such as the leisure pool and dance studios, help to give a detailed picture of the redevelopment.

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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